Too. Much. Sun.

John and his digger, busy at work at Long Point beach on Father's Day.

We did a few more days of outdoor activities this week. Mike has been really determined to get in more exercise and outdoor activities this summer - he finds now that he's back in school, he spends too much time sitting and reading. It's made him feel kind of blah and tired, and he feels he's been putting on too much weight. So we've definitely been doing more stuff outside as a family, which has been fun for everyone.

This week, I paddled a canoe for the first time in my life. There's this tiny little pond-lake, called Christie Lake, where you can rent canoes for a nominal fee. So we rented one for a couple of hours, and did a circle of the lake. If it was just Mike and I, I probably wouldn't have been that nervous. But I had Joan on the floor of the boat in front of me, and John was hanging onto the boat for dear life behind me, and I was worried I'd lose them both if the canoe tipped. Obviously, they were fully padded up in properly sized and tightly strapped life jackets, as was I, and the lake is completely calm and virtually self-contained, and about two feet deep for most parts, but that fear was still there. I think the hardest part was getting used to the movement of the boat itself. Just the way it wobbles around all the time. And I had to try to stay brave for John, who was just as worried as me.

Apparently, John actually jumped out of the boat before the rental guy could send us off. Once back in the boat, and on the water, he fell completely silent. As many of you will experience this summer, that is not a good sign for John. He's a talker, to put it mildly. He talks ALL THE TIME. And he doesn't just talk to hear himself talk - he's genuinely interacting. If he feels my attention is wandering, he'll say "Mommy! Talk to me!"

Anyway, so he was back there, white knuckling it on the side of the boat, in stunned and stoney silence. We'd ask him how we was, he wouldn't say anything. We'd ask him if he was OK, he wouldn't say anything. It took about half an hour before he finally let go of the boat, and touched the water. It was probably another half hour before he finally spoke. He said "Mommy! I looking at the water!" From that point on, he was totally himself, commenting on the grass and the birds and the ducks in the duck houses, and the stumps and the bugs. Afterwards, he said he'd had fun. And it was pretty fun. It was probably the best lake we could have started on - it was extremely small, calm and shallow. We'll probably go back again sometime, or maybe we'll try a slightly bigger lake next time. They had a small beach, and because the water was so shallow, the water was very warm. It was early evening, so there weren't many people, so we stayed to swim for a while. We actually got John in the water, having fun. He rode on dad's back, while dad swam around, so he got the sensation of swimming, and the security of dad's back. We assured him there were no crabs, and no lobsters. He seemed to buy it, and had lots of fun. But for the most park, he dug in the sand, and ran up and down the beach scaring flocks of lake gulls, which he thought was really funny. Joan had a good time, too. She really does love to swim.

Yesterday, Father's Day, Mike wanted to go back to the beach, but to scope out a different beach. Jer wanted to tag along, and suggested Long Point, near Port Dover, so that's where we went. I wasn't too keen on the idea of swimming in Lake Eerie. All I know is the humming fish in The Lorax didn't want to go there, because it was rumoured to be just as bad as their glumped-up pond. But other people were there, and they weren't breaking out in rashes, so I figured it was probably safe.

It was actually a really great beach. The shoreline was a series of sand bars, so you could either stay in this very hot, shallow area, between the bars, which was great for kids, or head out and swim in an actual great lake, which was a little freaky. It was surprisingly shallow - we had to go far out before the water was up to our necks, and out there, the waves were really huge! But if you jump just before they reach you, they'll kind of pick you up and carry you towards the shore. It was definitely an interesting sensation. Obviously, we didn't take the kids out that far. Jer watched them while I went out, and I watched them while Jer went out, and Mike stayed out the whole time, even though his initial plan heading to the car was to sit on the beach and read philosophy most of the afternoon. Oh well. He figures a day of swiming will help his school work more than spending all that time reading, anyway. He definitely seems a bit more cheerful and energetic lately, so I'm not complaining. I agree that he's been doing way too much sitting lately.

On the way home, there were fireworks at Ivor Wynne - some sort of Catholic festival - so we stopped to watch. By the time we got home, and got the kids through the tub, it was 11:30. I phoned my dad, who's a night owl. But our apologies to Mike's Dad, who we knew would have been asleep by then, so we couldn't call. But you weren't forgotten.

Anyway, Joan is up again, so I'd better head up to get her. Mike's at school today, catching up on the reading he was planning to do yesterday, and I have a full day of stuff to do. So I'd better get on it.

What a cutie!

A cute picture of Joan, taken this morning, just for fun. She's sitting in her stroller, and almost supporting her own weight. She's getting strong now - not as strong as John was at this age, but still strong. It must take a lot of muscle to hold up such a big little body!

She's really fun now, because she can control her hands really well. She grabs at everything. she loves to touch John's hair, but he's not so thrilled when she does. Her increasing mobility has sparked some sibling rivalries. She grabs his toys and books. He's good at sharing though, and he'll "read" her his books. He sat beside her and "read" her Goodnight Moon the other day. It was so cute! He's memorized it, so it looks like he's reading to her, even though he's not, entirely. But now and then, he won't share. So far, when that happens, I've been taking the toy away entirely. That sure gets him sharing in a hurry! I'm sure it will get more complicated as we go, though. But so far, John's a great big brother, and when I see him doing something nice for her, I make a point of slathering on the praise.

It's really interesting watching John develop. He's going through a bit of a phobia stage these days. He's been afraid of the dark for a long time, but now he has the words to articulate it. He'll actually stop before entering a dark room and says "I scared."

We've known about his fear of deep water for a while now, too. But now that he has more words, he was able to say why - he WANTS to swim with dad, but he's scared because he doesn't know how to swim, and he's afraid crabs will bite off his toes. I would never have guessed the crab part in a million years.

The other day, he walked in on me cooking sausages - one of his favourite foods - and he flipped out on me. Once I got him calmed down, he told me that sausages are people's fingers. After a quick explanation of how sausages are made, he happily ate three of them. I'm going to assume that one was from a bad dream of some sort.

It must suck to know enough about the world to finally put two and two together, but to understand it all so little that two plus two equals 15. At least we've had success in nipping some fears in the bud. I'm trying to work on spiders. I can see a phodbia brewing over those, so whenever we see one, we watch it together, and we tell him that spiders are our friends, because they eat bugs that want to eat our food. We've worked on monsters, too. Mike made the mistake one day of telling John that a monster lives in our house, and lives on the main floor while we sleep, in an attempt to keep him in his bed at night. Well, it kept him in his bed alright. He believed it completely, to the point where he said he'd SEEN the monster, and was scared. After the third monster sighting, we decided we needed to do something, so we morphed it into a creature who protects us from bad things while we sleep. I think we told him it spends its nights playing with the cats and eating ice cream. There have been no monster sightings since. (Though, I signed out Where the Wild Things Are from the library for him, and even though he keeps asking for it, he always hides behind me just before we get to the monster part.) Sure have to be careful what you say around little kids! Mike very rightly chastized me today for pointing out someone's race. Our mechanic is right across the street, and is a big black Jamaican guy. John had happened to see him move our car from the street into his garage to repair the flat tire, and had come to us upset, because he thought it had been stolen. I asked him if a big black man had taken it, and he said yes. My bad - we're trying not to point out differences in race, with the hopes of keeping him "colour blind". Doubt it will work, but it's worth a shot.

Anyway, I'd better get going.

Ugh. What a weekend

John, as the Lorax, in Algonquin Park

Holy cow, am I tired!

Mike has been a big ball of nerves lately, with work, school and association stuff. However, his mid-term was due Friday afternoon, and the schedule had been shifted to give him an actual weekend off, so he decided he wanted to unwind by going camping. I hate camping. But I figured John would really enjoy it, so we raided Jer's camping supplies, packed up the kids, and spent a weekend at Algonquin Park.

All in all, it was actually a really fun weekend. It was a lot of work, but it turned out to be a lot of fun, too. Algonquin Park is just north enough to actually look like home, which Mike seemed to really enjoy. But we were joking that it's kind of a Disney version of the north. Yes, there are moose and pine trees and swamps and swarms of black flies. But it all seems a bit too pristine and manicured. It almost felt like it was all created for the tourists. There sure were a lot of moose! Unlike the rest of the tourists, we didn't take pictures of them though. We thought it might be a bit strange to send you guys pictures of moose.

So let's see. A recap of the weekend. We left Friday after Mike got off work, but were running late, as always. We arrived at the park at 11:30 Friday night. We set up our tent in the middle of the night. Thankfully, we had no neighbours at the time. John was afraid of the dark at first. For the first 10 minutes or so, he stayed in his seat in the car. But eventually, he ventured out to see what we were doing, and he thought the whole thing was hilarious. He was squealing with laughter for quite some time, reciting passages of Dr. Seuss's The Lorax (I am the Lorax! I speak for the trees!)I took the lantern and headed tot he washroom at one point, and I could hear him laughing all the way there, maybe 100 yards away. We told him to look up, so he could see all the stars. I haven't seem stars like that in years. He LOVED the tent. He was so excited, it took him forever to wind down. We fell asleep before he did, but when we woke up, he was snuggled in with us. Good thing - it was c-c-c-c-cold!

The next day, we made breakfast, and John explored the campsite, asking what everything was, checking out the trees. He picked a lot of Trilliums for me, and our campsite was close to a lake, so Mike took John down the path to check it out. After that, we went for a drive. Algonquin Park has a number of old cabins, that were used as outposts for park Rangers. They're these little log shacks, mostly built in the 20's. Mike wants to stay in one some day, but most are only accessible by canoe. Some can be driven to, and one can be hiked to, so he wanted to see what one of the access roads was like - it's accessible by hike along the hydro right-of-way. However, before we got there, the road we were on had been closed. A beaver had dammed a culvert, so not only had part of the road flooded, but the water was eroding the road from underneath, where the culvert pipes were. It was maybe a two foot drop to the pipe, which was surrounded by rushing water, so it wasn't a very safe place to be. A bunch of cars were stopped there to check it out. One truck-load was filled with people heading to their cabin. They decided to go through the blockade, and keep going, but as they went over where the culvert was, their wheel broke through part of the road. And Mike said when the guy stepped out of the truck, to make sure it was OK, his foot went through another part. All the guys there told them not to go on - another guy there had a cabin, and he said the road was fine just that morning, so there wasn't going to be any surface left before long, so they may not be able to get home. But they still kept going. The other guy who said the road was OK that morning turned around. He had his grandkids with him, and wasn't going to risk getting stranded at the cabin. But his cabin was accessible by boat, so he was going to get his hands on one to get back and forth.

Obviously, we stopped before the MTO's little tape barrier. But we did park the car, and walk out with the kids to see what the beavers had done. It was really cool! It was a marsh that had been flooded. It had washed across the road, and was maybe two inches deep at the deepest part. But where it was just flooded, it was safe - it was only eroding by the two culverts. But that water was alive! It was teeming with tadpoles! Millions of tadpoles! Swarms so thick, the water was black in some places. And of course, there were tons of frogs. We saw at least a dozen. Maybe two, just in this tiny little pond across the road, maybe 20 feet long. John thought it was so cool! Mike caught a frog for him, so he could see one up close. He just laughed and laughed! When it jumped, he laughed some more! He even got up the nerve to touch the frog, and it jumped, which he thought was really great. And to top it all off, there were hordes of butterflies. Black and white ones, yellow ones, orange ones. Just tons of them! We didn't get to see what we were going for, but it was almost better that the road was washed away. It was a lot of fun. It was hard to drag John away. But it definitely left an impression. Last night in the tub, he was pretending to be a tadpole. Just hope those other people will be able to make it back out!

After that, we headed back to camp. We went to the beach for a bit. It was evening by then, so the water was a bit nippy. John doesn't like to swim. Mike tried to ease him in by carrying him, but wound up coming out with John wrapped so tightly around him, that he didn't even have to hang on. I had packed John's shovel, so he spent a bit of time digging in the sand, before we headed back to make supper.

Mike told me that it was possible to make chicken while camping. Not being a camper myself, I had to trust him on that one. So he set about to make chicken and potatoes for supper. He slathered the chicken in barbecue sauce, and wrapped it in tin foil, and then put it in the bottom of the fire. The potatoes were wrapped and put into the fire, too.

But wouldn't it burn you might ask? Supposedly, it will not, Mike said. An hour later, he hauled everything out of the fire. By this time, it was pitch black outside. But even by dim lantern light, we could see that all was not well in the dinner department. The chicken wasn't just burned. It was cremated. He managed to pry out a bone, and it crumbled in his hand. I was just about to go grab the hot dog wieners, when out of the charred remains he pulled some white flesh. It took some careful excavation work, but he managed to salvage enough chicken for a light supper. The potatoes weren't burned too badly. We peeled off the black skin, and the flesh inside was edible. But they were so dry, they were almost rubbery. Even the carrots were bad. We'd boiled them on the fire, and they were flavourless and tough. But there was enough there to call it supper, so that's what we ate. Unfortunately, the animals thought it smelled just fine. As we were eating, in the pitch black, with just one very dim lantern as a light source, we could hear forest creatures circling our camp. (The fire was waaaay on the other side of the site) Something large enough to crack twigs under its feet came within a few feet of John, Joan and I. Mike tried to find out what it was, but it scampered away into the bush before he could get a look at it. We figured it was probably either a fox or a raccoon. At least, that's what we hope.

It was too dark to do dishes, so Mike burned the leftovers, and we brought out the marshmallows. John was so looking forward to this part. He wanted to be like the Sneetches on the beaches, because they toast marshmallows. But the fire was too hot, and the sticks too short, and he was too tired to cope with it all, after a day outside with frogs and tadpoles and digging in the sand. So we toasted them for him, but he still didn't like them. Oh well.

As John sat there , slumped in a folding chair, eyes fluttering closed, we decided to squeeze in one more activity. We poked him awake and went for a walk to the beach, to look at the stars. He was a bit scared of the dark, but to his credit, I was too. There weren't many people out camping that weekend to begin with, and most of them were asleep, so there weren't even any fires around. Just blackness and silence. At one point, we passed a truck, and there was a guy in the drivers seat. He said hello, and we all jumped and yelped. Mike said "you may as well have said Boo." He looked like he felt bad - he was just trying to be friendly. Even the beach itself was a bit creepy. There was a very horror-flick type of mist coming off the water, and there were some birds making creepy noises around the corner. But all the creepiness was worth it - the stars were really something! I haven't seen that many stars, that bright, in years. John really liked it at first, and babbled about the stars. But after a while, he went quiet. I thought he'd lost interest. But Mike turned the light on, and we found him face down, fast asleep.

And that's probably how our day should have ended. But it kept going. Mike plays an online combat game, with a few thousand other people. He'd told them we were heading out this weekend, and joked, that wouldn't it be funny if he kept up on his turns while he was away. Ha, ha, ha. Until that point, he was pretty reasonable with it. He played his turns while we were stopped to feed Joan, or something like that. But he loses turns if he doesn't play for 16 hours, and he was due to lose turns. So, determined to be as strange as possible, we piled our sleeping children into the car, and headed to the next nearest town in search of Internet access. What a harrowing ride! That park is TEEMING. We saw two moose, a deer, a rabbit, three cats, and I forget what else. I'd forgotten how big moose were. It was almost surreal, watching this ginormous animal lumbering off into the woods. We saw two females. One was on the edge, and headed to the bush when we stopped. The other was walking down the road, on the opposite side of the street. It was even headed in the right direction. We had actually driven right past it without seeing it at first. We did a double take before it sunk in we'd just driven right past a moose. Mike turned around to get another look, and there it was, sauntering down the road. It looked back to see us, and pulled off to the shoulder to let us past. Mike followed it, trying to scare it back into the bush, so no-one would hit it, but it was pretty determined to stay. It just kept strolling down that shoulder, giving us glances now and then to see if we were still there.

We went to bed after that, but were woken early to the sound of wild animals ransacking our camp. They were after our leftovers. I couldn't tell what was out there, but I could hear a lot of commotion. All of our cooking gear was being tossed around, and things were getting knocked off the table. I thought it must be raccoons, but when I poked my head out, it was just ravens, and the sound of the zipper had scared them away. But in the light of day, many things had been put out of place. It seems that the forest critters were roasting marshmallows while we were away. One bag was missing entirely, and the other had been moved practically into the fire. The tin foil we'd wrapped the chicken in had been picked over, but it didn't look like they were able to find much to eat.

We slept until 11 that morning, and had to start packing up almost right away - check-out is 2 p.m. Once we got everything in the car, we headed to the beach for one last swim. Joan loves to swim! The water was a bit cold fer her the night before, but we brought her in that day, and she loved it! She was laughing and splashing about. John, however, was having none of it. He stayed on shore, digging holes in the sand. We did eventually coax him in on dad's shoulders, but he wasn't having any fun. He kept screaming that he couldn't swim, and that he was cold. So we took him back to keep digging. There was a little girl there who was fully equipped for a day in the sand. She had a whole laundry basket of plastic shovels and sifters and buckets. John just had his one little yellow shovel. So the two of them played together in the sand. It was actually a busy little beach. All young families - maybe a dozen kids altogether. John, my social butterfly, went from person to person showing off all the cool new toys he'd found on the beach. "Look! I have a hoe! I gardening!" "Look! I have two shovels!" It was very embarrassing, but the other family was happy to have someone new for their little girl to practice playing with, so it all worked out - she was barely 2, and also afraid to go into the water. They settled into a little game where John would shovel the sand into her bucket, she would dump it out, and they'd both laugh.

It was just supposed to be a quick swim to wash off for the trip home, but we wound up staying for a few hours. As a result, I brought out the sunscreen a little too late. Surprisingly, John is fine, even though he went a long time in full sun with no sunscreen at all. His cheeks are a little sun kissed, but you'd never know he was in the sun. Mike and my shoulders are burned, and Mike's face is burned a bit too. Joan got too much sun. She was looking pretty red yesterday, but it's looking better today. I was trying to shield her body with mine, and spent a lot of time under a shady tree with her, but she still got some redness on the top of her head, and her cheeks. But she's looking better today - it's just pink. What's shocking with her is the number of black fly bites covering her face. And of course, black flies are the ones that make you bleed, so she spent the whole weekend bleeding. John remarked many times about how I'd spilled ketchup on the baby. At one point, it clicked that it was blood - he told me she needed an ambulance. The worst one was on her eyelid. I had turned to put sunscreen on John, and by the time I got back to her, her eyelid was covered in blood. She was grinning ear to ear, but still covered in blood.

It wasn't even as bad as it could have been. Once we realized she was the preferred specimen for all the biting bugs, we went to the camp store, and found her a mosquito net. It was actually a mesh jacket, but it fit over her car seat, and kept her safe for most of Saturday and Sunday, as long as we kept her in her seat.

After that, we headed on the loooong drive home. Even it was exciting. We got a flat tire in Burlington - we have a nail wedged in the rubber right now. Luckily, we had a jack and a spare, so Mike changed it, and we went on our way. But John watched, and boy, did he think that was cool. When he got home, he changed all the tires on his tricycle, (which for the purpose had transformed into a race car).

All in all, an exciting weekend was had by all. When questioned, John says his favourite part was playing on the beach. But he's still talking about the frogs and butterflies and the flat tire a lot, too. Mike wants to do it again sometime. The advantage is, we don't have to go on a weekend, because I'm not working. But we'll see what his next schedule brings. If we can make it back, he wants to rent a canoe, and teach me how to paddle it. Should be exciting.

In other news, Joan has her first tooth!!!! It's been coming for a long time, and finally popped out over the weekend. She seems much more relaxed now that it's broken through. It's just the top ridge so far, so it's not big enough to bite me. I can see the second one coming, too, but it might take a while before it breaks through the gums.

Anyway, more pictures to follow:


John snapped this picture of Joan

This is John, Dad and the ill-fated chicken.

John on the beach on Sunday. The little girl he was playing with is behind him. He had swimming trunks, he didn't like that wet, clingy feeling, so he took them off and ran around naked. A diaper was our compromise.

Who's so pretty?

As promised - pictures of Joan in her dresses. This is one from our friends Jim, Joan and their family.

This is the very popular yellow sundress from Mike's grandma. Shockingly, both dresses - and indeed most of Joan's clothes - are 12-month size. There's the pink one from the cat photo, too, but my batteries gave out on me. I'll get it later. She has a pair of overalls from Mike's parents, too, which fit perfectly, but it bothers Mike because everyone mistakes her for a boy when she wears them. We just play along, to make them feel better, but one lady asked her name. When we told her Joan, she got a bit embarrassed, but it doesn't bother me that people can't tell. She's just a baby. It's impossible to tell, unless she's dripping in pink.

And who can leave out John. He's sporting his blue Canada T-shirt from Grandma Phillips. It's not new, but it's still in high toddler fashion. It doesn't get better than planes. Except maybe trains, or monster trucks. (He was actually butting in on me trying to take pictures of Joan. If you look hard, you can see her little feet back there to the right. What a ham!)

summer travel

Joan taking a "spin" in the Jolly Jumper. Not a happy experience- John kept spinning her around and around. But he took a break from his fun to snap this photo - I'm off to the side - she's giving me that "why me" look.

Ah summer. How it comes out of nowhere. Now that it's here, we've been discussing John's vacation plans. Life here is a little crazy until the end of June, but after that I am free to escort him to Dryden for a visit. We've been exploring our options. Bus is obviously the cheapest, but not even Mike is that cruel. Surprisingly, the plane and train are comparable, because kids ride free on Via this summer. Otherwise, plane would have been much cheaper.

Obviously, I'm favouring plane. Mike thinks it would be cool for John to take a train, and unfortunately, John agrees strongly. When I ask him if he'd like to fly on a plane, he screams "no!" and practically bursts into tears. I wonder what Mike's been telling him to make him react that way.

I don't know how much weight we should give John's vote, though. Technically, when asked, his first choice would be to travel by monster truck, with train a distant second, followed closely by tractor, then concrete mixer.

I must admit, when the idea of a 24-hour train ride with two kids was first proposed, I was pretty horrified, and more than a little peeved at Jer for first suggesting it, but maybe it would be fun, in a masochistic kind of way. Both times I took a train, it had tons of kids and babies on board, so it's not unheard of. And it would plop us in Sioux Lookout, which is a heck of a lot closer to home than Thunder Bay or Winnipeg. But we'll see. I guess I should be phoning home to work out dates and such. It's not like John, Joan and I have schedules to work around. If it weren't for a newsletter and community BBQ that I'm somehow in charge of organizing, we could leave this afternoon.

Anyway, speaking of the association, I had better get back at it!

Good news!

Joan sharing some tummy time with Mary. This is one of the dresses Mike's Grandma sent. Very cute. And it's been so freaking hot the last couple of days, I'm sure she's grateful for the bare legs. When we go out, I accossorize with her frilly pink socks and pink lamb Robeez, from my mom. Ugh. Blue sleepers are so much easier. It's going to take me a while to get used to this whole "girly" thing. It's strange dressing her in girl clothes. She looks so much like John did at this age, it's like seeing John in drag.


Well, the fireworks didn't go as planned. Joan seemed pretty amused by the whole thing, but John was tired, and in no mood for loud noises and bright lights. He covered his eyes and screamed that he wanted to go home for the first quarter. He watched the rest in sullen silence, but plugged his ears. But we made it up to him at the midway. We weren't going to go, because we've been so dirt poor, but John asked to check it out, so we did. Last year, he could only go on the merry-go-round, and he hated it. But this year, he was actually big enough for the kiddie train, and a ride just like the kiddie train, only with Jeeps. We just couldn't resist, and we bought him a few tickets. It was worth it to see the look on his face! He had so much fun! On the train, he made train whistle noises, and on the car, every time he looped around to us, he squealed "I'm driving car!" At one point, a teenager leaned over the rail and gave him a high five. It was like the best night of his life.

In other news, my cold is getting better. I can hear again! Well, pretty much. It's getting better, at any rate. And my ear doesn't hurt anymore, which I'm pretty happy about. It's still a bit swollen, though, but I think I'm winning the battle. :-)

In other news, our mortgage is up for renewal next month, and it looks like we're switching companies. The CIBC has our mortgage now, but we're switching to TD. They offered us a pretty awesome rate - .85 below prime for variable (5.15 as of today) and 5.1 for a fixed five year. Our TD lady got us preapproved a month ago, to get us that low fixed rate. CIBC offered us 5.29 for a fixed rate, and .85 below for variable. It's comparable, but we'd also lik to have everything with one bank, and she thinks she can work some financial magic with our line of credit, so TD wins hands down. When we left, Mike said to me "You know you're with the right financial institution when you want to reach over and hug your banker."

All that's left to decide is fixed or variable. We know there's a recession coming, but Mike's debating whether it will be "stasgflation" of the 80's, in which case, we should lock in, or a regular recession with low interest rates, in which case we should continue with the variable. Decisions, decisions. The banker pushed the variable, because historically, it's better, and they've been advised it will likely be a low interest recession. Variable has definitely saved us a bundle over the past five years. But Mike has heard some economists predict another period of stagflation, so he's not sure. (something to do with energy prices) I'm sure whatever he decides will work out fine. Even if it it is stagflation around the corner, how high can it really go? (Famous last words.)

life chugs on

A day of fun at the park with mom and dad on Mother's Day. He only let me take one photo.

At the height of John's cold - he wanted so badly to play, was was too pooped.

John's doing much better now. He's not napping in the day anymore, has a good amount of energy, and just gives a cough or two in the morning. It gives me hope that one day, my cold will end, too. I feel well enough to work hard though, but that's probably working against me in shaking the last little bit. The worst part is that it's still in my ears, so I can't hear much. I think one of them is getting infected, but it doesn't hurt enough to go to the doc. It's just plugged and sore. It will probably go away on its own. I remember getting a cold just like this when John was 3-months old. I guess it's the stress of having a newborn around.

Things here have been alright. Mike is back in school. He's using the summer term to knock off his humanities requirement - a full credit of philosophy, in 10 weeks. It's two three-hour classes each week, and the marks come from two essays, two exams, a weekly quiz, attendance and class participation. I think he's overly concerned about his first essay. He lives with a journalist and an english grad. I read one of Jer's essays - it was very good. I'm sure he can give a few pointers. And obviously, I'll help however I can. I think my expertise will come in handiest for the exam - it's a takehome exam, all with essay answers. But the catch is a word limit. Mike is the master of using 100 words where ten will do. My training is to trim that down to five, so I think I can help.

A bit thanks to Mike's grandma and my parents for their recent packages. I think the new potty book is responsible for John's potty success. The last line is "do you wamnt to be a big boy, like me?" The night before he used the potty, we read that book, and after that line, he got this very determined look on his face, and he nodded his head. I didn't think anything of it, but I think that was the turning point. Peer pressure from a cartoon boy in a book. But whatever works!

Everyone loves the little dresses that Mike's grandma sent for Joan. I put the yellow sun dress on when Mike got home fro work, and it got a round of ohhhh and ahhhh, and "who's so pretty?" in babytalk. I'll take a picture for everyone. I always swore I'd never dress up my daughter, as though she's some kind of doll. But it is a particularly cute dress. All of John's stuff fits, too. One pair of pants is big enough to fit for some time, which is good. The granola bars (aka cookies) were a huge hit, as always. He can't control himself around those things.

Joan's doing great. She hasn't been sleeping, like, at all, for the past few days. She sleeps better in with me, but I don't think she's cold. It's been warm here, and she has very cuddly blankets. She's stopped falling asleep after nursing, so I thought that she may be ready for food - John started waking up in the night when he was ready. But I gave it a try with baby oatmeal, and it was a no-go. Though, were eating beans a few days ago, and she was getting way overly excited watching the spoon go to my mouth. I put some on my finger for her, and she practically attacked it. But a proper meal of oatmeal? No thanks. She stuck out her tounge to block the spoon. Perhaps she's actually ready, but oats just aren't the right thing. We wound up starting John on banana way back when, because he didn't take well to cereal. Maybe she's the same. But I don't think it helped that while I was trying to feed her, John was beside me, wide eyed in horror, screaming, "No Mommy! Don't feed that to baby! That a yucky supper! That yucky! Yucky!"

Though, for all I know, she's just teething.

On the John front, potty training is going quite well. I have him weaned down to chocolate chips as a prize. No poop yet, but he's very good with the pee, as long as I keep the chocolate coming. Problem is, he won't do it if he's covered in any way - even underwear. He doesn't think to pull it down - he just treats it like a diaper. And if he needs to poop, I find he asks for a diaper to be put on. Hopefully, it will all work out in time. (As in, in time for September, when preschool starts.)

Well, I had better go. He's up, and wants to watch the trucks outside. Our neighbour is digging a new driveway, so there's a backhoe and a dump truck right outside our house. Toddler heaven. Oh, and yesterday, we had two police officers, too. We were witnesses to a crime of sorts. A shady looking character threw something white in our back ally. We thought it was drugs or something, so Mike went to investigate. It was a stack of cards from a stolen wallet. So we called the cops with his description. He had gotten on on a bus near our house, and because of our tip, they were able to track him downtown by calling the bus driver, but I'm sure he got away after that. Twenty-year old black kids in baggy tee-shirst don't exactly stick out downtown. We wished we'd gone out sooner - we called a few minutes after he'd vanished, because we were worried he might be armed. If we'd called sooner, maybe they could have cought him on the bus. But we weren't sure if it was something illegal, or if he was just littering, until we went out and saw the cards. Nevertheless, two cops showed up here to interview me and collect the woman's cards, which John found very exciting. As the second one arrived, he said "Look! Police! He going to shoot!" I was so embarrassed.

Tonight, we're packing up the family, and probably Jer, to watch the fireworks! John's going to love it! Not sure about Joan. She scares a bit easier than John did at this age, but hopefully, she'll enjoy it, too.

Anyway, better go. The trucks await!

It happened!!!!

Oh my goodness!

HE PEED IN THE POTTY!!!!!!!!!!

I AM SOOOOOOOO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!

What a great moment. He came tearing around the corner yelling "Mommy, I peed potty!" I checked, and sure enough, there was pee in the potty! Woohoo!

However, there's a downside. I had promised him a piece of chocolate if he peed or pooped in the potty, so of course, I delivered. But then, as he was eating it, he ran back to the potty, and managed to squeeze out a couple more drops. The first chocolate wasn't even gone before he was asking for a second, as a reward for his miniscule little dribble.

I don't know if he'll accept that going potty is its own reward. I guess either I'll have to wean him off chocolates, or stock up. But for now, I don't care - HE USED THE POTTY!!!!!!

Woohooooo!!!!!

The cold that won't die

Yup, still sick.

Sorry no photo. I didn't plan to update, but have a minute to kill while I feed Joan. John's still sleeping, but I don't think I'll have time to download the camera before he trudges down.

Poor little guy is still sick too. He wakes up with a hacking wet cough every morning, and often through the night. Mike and I have it too, but not as severe. It's really wiped John out. He's actually back to napping in the day. Last week, I realized that the house seemed a bit quiet, so I went hunting for him. I found him fast asleep in his bed. He was so tired, he'd gone up and tucked himself in. I have a picture to download of him asleep on his slide from yesterday. He called me to come play with him, and rested his head to wait. In the time it took me to get there, he'd fallen asleep, and stayed asleep for an hour.

I don't remember having a cold last this long, ever. It's terrible. It's in my ears. I haven't been able to hear in ages. But my cough is going away, so it should ease off for John soon, too. Mike seems to be pretty much over it.

Shockingly, Joan is still OK. She woke up stuffy a couple of mornings, and was a bit sneezy and groggy for a day or so, but other than that, is perfectly fine and healthy. No wonder I'm so sick - I've given all my antibodies to her.

Other than being sick, life chugs on. We have pink tulips!!! Five of them. They're very pretty. They came with the house, but the boys next door never let them bloom. They'd always come so close, and then one of them would trample them, or whack off the heads. So in five years here, this is the first time we've ever seen what they are. Unfortunately, we had to lose our neighbours to be able to see them. The single mom and her four kids up and left one day. They didn't even say goodbye, even though they spent a lot of time in our backyard. I know she had trouble paying her gas bill (we can obviously sympathize) so she needed to find a place where heat was included. Apparently, according to Paul-the-corner-store-guy, they found one, but it's further into the inner city, in a much rougher neighbourhood. Hopefully, her kids are OK.

Mike and John had a cute conversation yesterday. It started when Mike said "I love John," and it sparked a five minute back and forth about what things each loved. I wish we had a recording of it. Some of the things John loves are: birds, dad's van, the house, the green flowers that fall from our maple tree, the baby's race cars (on her sleeper), the moon and of course, candy.

We got the garden in this week. Nothing exciting, We actually scaled itback quite a bit. No pumpkins, even. Mostly salad stuff, and a few herbs for Jer. Though, we're going to try watermelon again, just for a good laugh. Last year, we got one to be about half an inch long. John has been enjoying his spring mucking about in the garden. He keeps standing in the middle, with a pitch fork or a shovel in one hand, proclaiming "Mommy, I farm chickens." No idea where he's getting that from, or why he keeps saying it, but it's entertaining all the same.

Well, I'd better go. I have a newsletter to make for the association. It's a daunting task, so I've been avoiding it for way, way too long.

school's out

This was taken the same day as the video. I asked him to wave hello.

Sorry for no really recent photos. Things have been a little crazy around here. Mike's been busy finishing up school, and I've been helping him. He had two labs and an essay due Monday morning. We got them done, but it took a tough all-nighter to pull it off. We had endless problems. First he'd done the calculations wrong, and had to almost start from scratch for one of them. Another one got lost in our computer, and when a version was finally found in some temporary folder somewhere in the bowels of our hard drive, we'd lost hours and hours of progress. It was awful. Each lab takes about 20 hours to write up at the best of times, so these aren't small whip-em-off reports. We'd worked on them for weeks. And try proofreading 16 pages of formulas and physics terms, written by someone who doesn't know what a period is. Not fun. Not fun at all. But it's worth the extra work - he's gotten 11/10 on every lab so far this year, with comments like "I wish I could give you more."

Complicating matters is a wretched cold or two. If it's two, they're identical, but I have a feeling it's all the same one. I've had it twice, but I think it's just a relapse of the same virus. It's horrible. I've been working hard and pushing myself, with late nights working on homework with Mike, but I just don't have any oomph. The laundry and dishes have piled up, but it's not like I can take a sick day, and Mike's been way to busy to take up any of the slack. John's got it, too. I can hear him hacking away on the baby monitor. Mike started getting it last night. The only ones who've escaped are Adrian, probably because he isn't here enough, and Joan. Though she's been sneezing the last day or so, so she may be next. But hopefully I'm giving her enough antibodies, to boost up what she's making herself, to pull her through unscathed.

As much as I hope she pulls through, I have to admit, it's been kind of fun being sick with John, now that he's older. He's been a bit of a snarly bear towards everyone but me, which is a pain to deal with. It's hard to know where to draw the line between disciplining "bad manners" and pitying him for being a poor kid who just feels yucky and wants to attach himself to mom and push the rest of the world away. I feel bad for Jer, who's been the target of some aggression. But for me, it's been days of Treehouse and cuddling in bed, surrounded by books, so its been a nice break. This has been the closest I'll ever get to "time off". I feel bad about the house, but I just can't do it all. I really, really need a rest. So instead of slugging through housework, John and I cuddle and play lots of games. In one game, he gets me to hide under the blanket, which he calls going "in the egg". (We watched chicks hatching on youtube one day. Since then, he's been hiding under blankets, then bursting out of them screaming "I broke egg!") So anyway, I go in the egg, and he pretends to be a monster looking for me. He says "Hmmm. Where Mommy? Hmmm...Where Mommy?" And then he says "raaaarrrr" and "boings" on top if me. Yesterday, we were playing this game, and it was making him tired, so he climbed into the egg with me, snuggled in and said "I a tired monster." It was very cute.

He and Joan have been bonding. A few days ago, she was in my lap, and he started playing peek-a-boo with her. We never get a reaction from her when we play it, but she giggled at John every time he uncovered him face. She adores him. She watches him all the time. Studies him meticulously. she'll follow every bite of food to his mouth. She'll watch him run around, and the expression on her face really looks like she wants to join right in. When he talks to her, she grins from ear to ear. The other day, he sang row row row your boat to her. He started to dance, then he said "dance, baby! Dance!" When he's "boinging" (jumping on the furniture) I hold her up and bounce her up and down, so it's like she's boinging too. It makes them both laugh. He likes to "read" to her and tell her what all the things are in his books. Yesterday, we were heading out, and Joan was in her seat by the door, and John was waiting for us beside her. I happened to glance over, and he was bending down to gave her a kiss. It's been fun to watch him warm up to her. I think once she gets mobile, they'll have lots of fun together. There will be fights too, obviously. But I really hope they'll be friends.

John's passed into a "what's that?" phase. Mike thinks it's great, but it really grate on my nerves sometimes. Now, instead of reading his books, it's a half hour of him pointing to each minute detail in every picture, and asking what it is. He's been getting a lot of mileage out of his Richard Scary books because of this phase. (He loves Lowly. When we dig in the garden, and he sees a worm, he says "look, mommy! A Lowly! He's found an ant hill, too. He likes too lay on his belly and wach them work.)

Mike laughed at me the other day, because one of the pictures in one of his books is a bunch of frogs, and he was pointing to each frog one by one.
"What's that"
"A frog."
"What's that?"
"A Frog"
"What's that?"
"A frog."
"What's that"
"A frog."

It can get mind numbing sometimes. But I try to spice it up. I ask him what things are, and he knows most of them. I don't know why he's asking me. Lately, I've been trying to add details. We talk about what colour it is, what kind of shape it is, and what the object is for or how it works. He seems to like it. Though every now and then, if I get bored, I give him the wrong answer for things. He'll point to a cat, and ask me what it is. I'll say "that's a tractor." And he always gives me this withering don't-you-know-anything kind of look, and says "No mommy. That's not a tractor! It's a cat!"

On the Joan front, all is well. She's a pretty happy kid. She had a doctor's appointment yesterday. Two more shots, and a quick once over. He says she looks great. Still growing well, though she does seem to be slowing down a little. She was just over 18 pounds, and 66 cm long. There was some concern at the pediatrician's office that her head was growing at a slower rate than the natural growth curve, but he checked, and said she's right on track. So she must have measured wrong the first time after all, like she thought she had. He siad her heart seems to be healing. He said it's much, much fainter than the last visit. He said it's barely audible now, and should be gone soon, which would suggest it was a small hole of some sort, which he said is very common, and won't have any impact on the health of her heart later in life. Good news all around. He gave us the green light to start cereals, if she seems ready. But I know she's not; Mike tries to feed her stuff like pudding and things, and she still pushes it out with her tongue. Babies aren't developmentally ready until that reflex vanishes. I'm in no rush, but I know Mike really enjoys the food phase. And I think John will get in on it, too. He tries to feed her stuff all the time. I'm happy that he wants to share with her, but it's a little alarming to find him trying to stick a spoon he'd loaded with peanut butter into her mouth, which happened just a few days ago.

I'm glad she's not growing quite so crazily anymore. People look at her strangely when I tell them she's only four months old. At the doctor's office, there was a woman there with a five month old daughter. Her baby was this teeny tiny thing compared to Joan, and she leaned into her daughter and whispered "watch out for that baby - she might eat you!" People are even more surprised to find out she's breastfed exclusively. They think I must be stuffing her up with cereal. (But actually, breastmilk is like 16 per cent fat, or something crazy like that, so she wouldn't gain much on cereal.) But the doc isn't worried, and his is the only opinion that counts. She isn't fat at all. She's tall enough to make the measurements in proportion to each other, so she's perfectly fine and healthy. Just really, really big, and the doc says it's a good sign that she is. What I don't understand is how she's gaining so much weight, even though I'm not losing any.

Well, John just staggered downstairs and wiped his nose on my leg. He doesn't look very good today. He was at a sitter's yesterday, because we had an association meeting. She took them to the park for the evening. He enjoyed it, and it tuckered him out, but it looks and sounds like it made his cold quite a bit worse, so I'd better go look after him. Poor kid.

Testing, testing, 123

Ok - trying something new. I think I've figured out how to post video to the kids' blog. Let me know how it works on your end! They were both tired, so it's not very exciting, and John must have been hot, because it was 21 degrees, but he insisted on wearing his jacket, boots and a hat. But if it works, and you guys like it, I'll do more!

Quick update

A few pictures from our visit from Mike's parents. John was treated to a day in Niagara Falls. He's STILL talking about it. That was what - six weeks ago?! He still tries to recreate Niagara Falls. A couple weeks ago, he had piled flour on the table, and was brushing it onto the floor, while squealing "look, Mommy! Niagara Falls!!!" To this day, if we ask him to tell us about Niagara Falls, he gets all wide-eyed, and rambles excitedly about birds and big fishies. Guess we'll have to take him back!



Sorry for no update in a while. Things have been a little hairy around here. We have an extra person in the house, and Mike is into finals at school, which all means more pressure on me.

Mike's first exam is tonight. It's math - his weak link. He's pretty nervous about it, but at least he can get it out of the way early. I'm sure he'll spend a few days lamenting that he didn't do as well as he'd like, but after the angst dissipates, he should feel a lot better. I haven't seen him in weeks. He goes to school every day. He stays late on school nights, and heads there after work on work nights. But it's paid off mark-wise. He's doing very, very well. I'm worried he's starting to burn out a little, but it's almost over. We've been talking that we'll need to do something fun as a family after this is all over. He suggested taking the kids to the Science Centre. Maybe we should go to Niagara Falls! I thought Marine Land might be fun. I haven't been there in years.

John is going through a "phase." A needy, clingy kind of phase. At first it seemed just random and out of nowhere, but I've noticed a distinct pattern. It has something to do with Jeremy being here, because that's when he acts up. During the day, things are fine. But when Jeremy is here, John won't let me talk to him. Won't let me do much of anything, frankly. Just checking my e-mail sends him into fits of rage. Last night, he flew off the handle because I dared to cook dinner, instead of play with him and his trucks. It's strange. It's not like I pay him oh so much attention in the day, but if Jer is around, he demands full attention and constant play. I don't know what the issue is. I'm thinking it might be that he has an audience, so is acting up, because when Jer is gone, he's his normal self. He doesn't do it when dad is home, whether Jer is around or not, (though he's very clingy of dad when he's home.) Maybe he thinks Jeremy is replacing Dad, and thinks he'll replace me too. Mike did start his psycho heavy school hours in around the time Jer moved in. Maybe he thinks it's linked. I don't know, and his language isn't strong enough to express it. It's just strange. Any ideas? Alice - you took child psychology. Does this sound like anything you learned? I just want my happy kid back!

Joan is doing well. She had a follow-up at the pediatrician yesterday. All her brain scan results were perfect, she said. Now that her heart is larger, she has the murmur isolated to three possible causes. One is a small hole low in the heart, one is a larger hole further up, and the third is a narrowing of one of the arteries, I don't remember which one. She said none of them are a problem. The only one that could be an issue is the larger hole, which can occasionally require surgery. But she's fairly confident she can rule that out, because kids with that heart defect often fail to grow well, and that's obviously not an issue for her. Even if she had it, it would likely heal on its own in a few years. The other two are completely harmless, and will sort themselves out. If it's the little hole, it will close, and if it's the artery, it will widen with age. I asked what happens if they don't fix themselves. She said they always do. Joan's due back when she turns one for a check-up. The doc rated her murmur as a 2, on the 1-6 scale.

The only thing alarming was her size. She said she has the height and weight of an average 8-month old, at 17 pounds, 15 ounces, and 26 inches long. But her head is about average for her age - even slightly below. She said not to worry about it, especially considering that John grew very much the same way, though not as dramatically. He grew very quickly at the start, but now he's just average in all his measurements. It doesn't mean she'll be a giant or anything - it's just her unique growth curve. I guess it's alright that her head not be where her body is yet - developmentally and mentally, she's still only 3.5 months.

Anyway, John is here, so I'd better go.

She's smart!

Joan's neurology appointment was today. They hooked her up to a computer with a bunch of electrodes, then flashed a strobe light at her, one eye at a time, and then blasted a very annoying beeping sound in each ear, one at a time. Everything's fine! Yay! We figured it would be, but it's nice to hear for sure. The doctor said even before the tests started that the test wasn't needed - when it was over, she said she could tell nothing was wrong the second we walked in the room. Joan looked right at her, tracked her around the room, and gave lots of smiles and giggles whenever she was smiled at and talked to.

The doc said all babies are a little different, and she obviously just needed a bit more time to develop on the social end of things, but she's caught up and is perfectly fine. I guess that's what happens when the first is a social butterfly - anything short of what John was doing seemed wrong. We were at our friend Jim and Joan's house last night, and Jim said they went through the same thing with their kids - their son learned to read at 3, so when their daughter couldn't do the same, they were worried, but in reality, SHE was the normal one.

Anyway, just wanted to post that up here quick. I have to go make supper now. We've been out all day, and are running late. I don't get the car that often, so when I do, I tend to put WAY too much on my plate.

fun in the sun!

It was 15 degrees and sunny yesterday, so the kids and I said to heck with housework, and spent the day in the back yard. We had lots of fun! This is a self-portrait by John.

John on his slide. Always going against the flow.

John and his Tonka dump truck. It was used to tote leaves for most of the afternoon.

John snapped this photo of Joan. I think he did a good job.

Who's a happy baby-waby...

I'm a happy baby-waby!

Not sure what this look means, but it's still cute!

What good is spring without a giant pile of soggy, semi-composted leaves to roll around in?

And to cap off the day, we came in to a package from my parents waiting on the doorstep.Thank you! The clothes are great, and John LOVES the trucks! He even took them to bed with him last night. They got to sleep on the pillow.

It was a fun day. Even John agrees. When I put him to bed last night, he stroked my cheek and whispered "I had good day, mommy. I had fun leaves."

I have a rare few minutes for more or less just me, so I'm going to go enjoy it. Jer went to Ikea to buy blinds, Mike's working on math at school, John was so pooped from the excitement of moving day that he's asleep on the dining room floor, so it's just Joan and I, and she's happy to just snuggle in on my lap. Hope you all enjoy the pictures. Yay spring!

Joan smiling

Well, I only managed to get one cruddy, washed-out photo of Joan smiling, before John saw the flash and zoomed to the scene. But a smile's a smile! I'll try to get a better one soon. I'll have to find a distraction for John. Not even cartoons can keep him from a camera, so I'll have to find something really good. She's going to look at her baby pictures one day and wonder why John is in every one.

Kids are doing well. Joan's neurology appointment is on Tuesday, so keep those fingers crossed.

A HUGE thanks to Mike's grandma for the clothes! She was down to two things that sorta fit, so it's nice to have a few extra sleepers when she's having a particularly poopy day. I had to dress her in her snowsuit one day, so she wouldn't get cold waiting for the laundry to dry. John won't put on the slippers yet, but he likes to look at them. They have an honoured place in his dump truck.

Jer moves in tomorrow. He'll be here any minute to get stuff in his room ready. Place is a major disaster area right now, because I've been busy with association stuff the last two days. But I should be able to have it more or less clean before his friends get here tomorrow morning. It's amazing how fast the house degrades into chaos, without constant tidying.

I guess the big news this week is with Mike. He's playing with the idea of going back to school full-time in September. He had a look at what yet needs to be done, and he had a whack of courses that must be done in the first term, when his work is busiest, so part-time would be prett impossible. I suggested he look into his company policy of leaves of absence, and take a term off work. That option is still on the table. We also went to the OSAP site, and plugged in our info to the calculator. He can get I think $12,000-$14,000 per year, and all but $7,000 is in the form of grants, because of the kids. It's less to live on than a paycheque, but we think it's doable. Going full-time also opens doors to other funding possibilities, because we'll be classed as low-income. We may be able to get a subsidized daycare spot from the city, which would make our daycare virtually free, but we won't know until we have a bunch of forms together. He actually has to get the ball rolling, and apply to school and OSAP before we can find out if we'd qualify. If he can keep his marks up, he may also qualify for a bursary from his school. It has tax implications, too. Our child tax credit will become bigger, and we'll probably qualify for the GST rebate. I think we could muddle through. It would be two lean years, but then it would be done. The alternative is two years of part-time, including a one term leave of absence either this september or next, and one final year of full-time, to get his degree. He's torn on which way to go. I favour the just-get-it-done scenario, but we need to really look at the numbers before we jump in. We've talked about different ways to use the house to our advantage. We have to renew in June, and I think our broker can do something to help.Maybe stretch the term out. Mike hates that idea, though. He wants as much going on principle as possible, to get as big a lump as possible when we sell, likely in 3-4 years. We also talked about renting it out as a house, for the price of our mortgage, then renting some hole in the wall near school to cut our living costs, while still hanging on to the house. Obviosly not an option for this year. But I may even be able to get a job at one of our niagara papers. It could work out well, if we chose the right tenants, though it would count as income, which would mess up OSAP. It's hard to know what to do. It's going to take a big leap of faith, no matter what we do. But he really, really needs to get his degree. There's no future in Bell. One of the other contracting companies was just dissolved, because the union voted against a massive pay cut. All those guys are losing their good-paying jobs, and frankly, that's the future for Mike's company, too. The telecommunications industry is changing from copper to fibre optics. He said it will require a college diploma to do his job after things switch over. It will be done by new companies, and his will be phased out and shut down. It's not a stable future. He'll be in his late 30's or early 40's, out of a job, and trained in an obsolete technology. Either way he's looking at retraining, so why not retrain for what he actually wants to do?

Anyway, we have a bit of time to decide what to do. But in the meantime, he's still planning to take one summer course, investigate a leave of absence, and also get the ball rolling on full-time and OSAP, to keep his options open come September.

What do you guys think?

Anyway - better go clean!

truck stop

I stumble across strange scenes like this more and more these days. This is picture of John's trucks, snacking on granola bars in the den.

Two peas in a pod

Joan and John, hangin' on the couch. It was meant to be a Joan photo-shoot, but as soon as John saw the camera appear, he was stuck to her like glue. As I recall, he was explaining to her that she had to say "cheese". He's with his new favourite toy - dad's hammer - much to the horror of our walls.


This is a portrait of Joan, chillin' on the couch. John took this picture (with a little aiming help from Dad)

Things here are good. Mike's parents were just for a visit, and took John out every day, including to the aviary at Niagara Falls. I've been treated to many excited, arm-waving ramblings about birds and "big fishies". There's some talk of John summering in the north, but no details as of yet.

One exciting thing - Joan rolled over this morning! Yay! Only half way, from her back to her side, but still pretty exciting. As I recall from John, the other half is tough, because that pesky arm gets in the way. But it was neat to watch - it took her a couple minutes, but she had a big grin on her face the whole time, and looked so pleased when she finally got herself up. It's a new era, though. I can't leave her on the couch to grab a diaper anymore. Time to set up the playpen downstairs I think! It has a basinet, so it's a safe place to leave her, now that she's trying to get some mobility.

And now, a message from John:

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,,

Just a cool aside - just tested something that Mike's parents said. Partway through, I asked John to press the 5 button. Neat, eh? Though, I asked him to press the 7, and he pressed 1, but still. He went straight for the 5.

new weight

I had to delay Joan's well-baby to yesterday - Mike needed the car for school last Thursday.

Updated weight is 16 pounds, 3 ounces, at two months and a week old. Sorry - didn't get the updated length, but I'm sure she's longer too. She's pretty much doubled her weight - something that typically happens by four months, so she's growing very fast. Doc says she's "growing beautifully," so it's all good. Not sure what we're going to do about car seats. Looks like we might have to buy a second one - John can't move to a booster until he's 40 pounds, but she needs a bigger seat once she hits 20-22 pounds. I was hoping he'd hit 40 when she hit 20, but I have a feeling she'll beat him.

She got shots this time, poor kid. She just looked shocked with the first one, but she really howled with the second, and was out of sorts for the rest of the day.

She wouldn't look into his little light this time. I mentioned what happened at the specialist, and all the tests she has coming up. He asked if we're getting eye contact, and I said yes. She's much better now. She even tries to initiate eye contact from us, and if we smile, she smiles too, without much effort or even funny voices. She seems to giggle at nothing at all though - she'll just be staring off and start to giggle - but I think I remember John doing that, too, so I'm sure it's nothing. And I'm pretty sure her ears are fine - if she's crying in her cradle, she calms down when she hears me talking to her, even before I'm anywhere near her.

He told me the actual name of the type of murmur she has, but it was an awfully long name. It had a couple of P words in it, but that's all I can remember. He said basically, it means it's one she should be able to outgrow, which is what the pediatrician said, too. I'm sure everything will work out fine. Her pregnancy got off to a rocky start, too, but it all worked out in the end.

Joan's appointment

This picture was taken during summer in Washington. He's glaring at me because I dared to take a bite out of the ice cream bar he'd just stolen from me. (He didn't like the one he'd chosen for himself, so he took mine instead.)

I thought we were due for a John picture. Poor guy is feeling a bit cast aside these days. He keeps telling us he's a baby, in a ploy for more attention. If we point out that he's a big boy, he screams "No! I liddle!" The other day, Joan was upset, but not hungry, so I was letting her suck on a finger to calm down. John saw that, sat right down beside her, and started knawing on another finger on the same hand. It was quite a sight. When I change the baby, he wants to be changed too. When I bath the baby, he wants a bath too. Thankfully, he hasn't started breastfeeding again, too, though I was a little nervous at the beginning. When he saw me feed her for the first time, he knew exactly what was going on. "Baby drink milk?" he asked. He asked to try it too, and all the books I've read said to say yes. Chances are, they have no interest in breastfeeding - they just want to know it's not off limits. If it's put off limits, it will become a battle. So I said yes, and he kind of mimed breastfeeding, without even touching me at all, smacked his lips, said "yummy milk", toddled off, and it hasn't come up again since. Well, there was once more. I had just finished feeding Joan. He came in with a glass, which he held up to my chest, as though I was some sort of soda dispenser. "Milk?" he asked. Mike thought he wanted the real deal, and figured I should pump a little for him. Well, I wasn't heading down THAT road without some resistance, so I filled his glass with cow milk, and that was the end of it. He was just thirsty.

On the topic of John, he's discovered that it's fun to be "lost". He did this first at Canadian Tire just before Christmas. We needed a rope to buy a tree. We'd picked one out, and turned to go, and John was gone! But I could hear him in the next isle saying "I lost! I lost!" I turned the corner and found him with a huge grin on his face, holding hands with a very stressed-looking white-haired gentleman. That guy sure looked happy to see me!

He did it AGAIN a couple of weeks ago. I guess I've been a bit blue lately, so Mike took us to Ikea to cheer me up. (Who doesn't love a trip to Ikea!?) He even bought me a laundry hamper! Woohoo! (Sometimes I think maybe I'm TOO easy to please.)

Anyway, we were wandering through linens when John bolted off. We weren't too worried - he always seems to know where we are, and he never wanders far. So Mike sauntered off to bring him back. He came back a minute later, white-faced, without John. I've never been so afraid in my life! It's a huge store, with lots of people jostling about, with lots of shortcuts and nooks and crannies. He could have been anywhere! He could have been abducted! Mike told me to stay put, in case he came back, and took off to find John. But not wanting to do nothing, I poked my head through one of the short-cuts, and there was John, leading a woman straight to linens. She had found him looking around alone, so took his hand and asked where mommy was. He knew exactly where he was - pointed straight to where I was and started leading her there. We converged halfway. I thanked her profusely, and said a little thanks that another mom found him, and not some sicko pervert. I'm very glad he has a good sense of direction, but he needs a better sense of danger!

On to Joan's appointment. It wasn't fun. There might be something wrong with her brain. But don't fret. Everyone just take a deep breath. The vomit thing is fine, and she's going to monitor the murmur until she's six months before ordering any tests. She said chances are, she'll outgrow it once her heart valves and arteries become stronger, typically by six months.

However, she asked about her development. I mentioned that we don't get much eye contact from her. I said she kind of looks through us when she looks at us, and doesn't make much eye contact at all. She asked about smiling. I said she smiles, but not socially. She just smiles at things. I honestly couldn't remember what John did at that age, but it seemed a little odd to me. So the doc did a few little tests, and she failed most of them. She got no response from a loud noise, no eye contact, no focus on a flashing light and no smile in response to a smile. So now, she's headed for testing at Mac. I think the appointment is March 20. They'll test how her brain reacts to visual and audible stimulation. She said it could just be developmental - the milestone is two months for a lot of these things, and she was only six weeks at the time. She said she's not blind or deaf, so don't worry about that. But she said it could also be a delay in the brain, or trouble processing information. Autism was bouncing around in my head, but no-one said the A word out loud. She asked if I did drugs. She asked if I was depressed.

It was an extremely stressful appointment, but I think things are looking better. I thought about what she said about depression. It's a very strong word, so I wouldn't use it to describe me at all, but it's definitely been harder to shake the baby blues this time. But it's not because of her - she's great - it's everything else, and I think I'm justified in being blue, so I don't think it counts. But one of the problems with being blue is not smiling enough at the baby, and that delays their social development, and I know I haven't been smiling much at all lately. And we've been trying to still give lots of attention to John, and it takes a lot more work to keep the house tidy the second time aound, so maybe she just wasn't getting enough play time or attention. We've been making sure she's fed and dry and rested, but she needs to play, too. So we've been working really hard with Joan, with lots of face time and smiles, and she's getting much, much better. She's still pretty distractable, but we can get eye contact, and she'll lock on my face and follow it around. She likes to watch John now. She smiles at us now too, if we smile enough and talk in funny voices. She even kind of giggles sometimes. She coos now, too, so language development is right on track. Every day, she gets more and more social. Maybe it would have happened anyway, like the doc said, but more attention never hurt anybody. Well, except for John, who now wants to be a baby, so he can get more attention for himself. I can't win! So hopefully, she's completely normal. Everyone keep your fingers crossed! And if something actually is wrong, we'll cross that bridge then.

Oh, and for those who are keeping track, Joan was 14.7 pounds and 24 inches long at the appointment, which was last week. She has her regular well-baby tomorrow, so I'll post her official 2-month weight then.