This is what John did the whole time we were at the tree farm. This is Mike perusing the pre-cut selection, so we could get him back home to bed 

John upon arrival at the tree farm, obviously ready for some family fun 

John obviously caught his second wind after we picked up the tree - we took him to get groceries, and he pushed. 

catching a ride on Dad

Sheesh! It’s been a while. Things have been busy, and I haven’t felt like updating much, to be honest.

But let’s see. Despite many trials and tribulations, including our car being stolen just days before, and having to buy a new one for the trip, we actually made it home. We even made it alive, despite freezing rain and bad tires.

We stopped in Geraldton on the way, where john was reunited with Mac. Now that John is up and running, he had lots of fun. Grandma got him a whole load of cool new toys, including a hand-made logging truck, which although designed to be pushed around, is the perfect straddle-size for John, who prefers to ride it. When he does, it tends to fall apart, at which time, he’ll cart the pieces to one of us one-by-one for repair, chanting “uh-oh” all the way.

After a day of recouperation in Geraldton, it was off to Dryden, where John was dumped with relatives, while Mike dragged me off to Bill Brown’s campaign office. Don’t get me wrong – I really like Bill Brown, and I hope he wins. But boy, was I wiped. I was there because I actually needed a vacation, but got back feeling more exhausted than when I left.

John seemed to have a good time. We didn’t see him much, but when we did, he was happy. We took him swimming a few times in Mike’s parents’ basement pool. He actually dunked his head under and “swam” for a few seconds at a time. My heart stopped every time he did it, but he obviously knew exactly what he was doing.

Mike’s parents also rented a slide, and he had fun climbing up the back, and sliding down. I tried to show mike just before we put john to bed one night, but he was a little too naked from his bath, so he stuck to the plastic and tumbled down instead. Still laughing all the way, mind you, but it wasn’t exactly graceful.

My parents dug up some of our old toys, and sent us home with a bucket of our old magnetic letters. We have them all over the fridge now, and he loves playing with them. I find little stashes of them everywhere. He also discovered the old blue chair, which has no legs, making it low enough for him to hop up easily. We often found him relaxing in the chair, reading himself a book, grinning from ear to ear. Life was good for John; he had a comfy chair and a good book.

Mike’s parents got us snow tires for the trip home, which we really appreciated after a week or so sliding all over town. Although it was sad to leave, we needed to go – John was showing some signs of wear. He was getting sluggish and sniffly. All that excitement seemed to be bringing on a cold. His nose was running by the time we got to Geraldton, but that didn’t deter mike, who was determined to take John tobogganing in the six inches of fluffy new snow. So we got a sled, all piled on, and headed down this horrible hill, which turns in the middle, and ends up with you going through bushes! By the time we got to the bottom, John was screaming. Mike wanted to give it another go, so he headed back down with john. They plowed through new snow when they got to the bottom, which sprayed up and covered John head to toe in snow. He wasn’t amused. That was the end of tobogganing. Maybe next year.

It hadn’t done his cold any good. He was wiped. Like, beyond wiped. As wiped as can be. The morning we got up to go, he was in such a foul mood. He hadn’t eaten his dinner the night before and he’d been up screaming all night. He probably felt yucky, with a sore throat and stressed out from the trip and getting a cold, and had that “I just want to go home” kind of meltdown. The next morning, it seems he screamed non-stop. By the time I got his jacket on to go, he’d completely had it. He flaked out flat on the kitchen floor, caressing the satin edging of his pink blanket with one hand, thumb from the other hand firmly wedged in his mouth, just laying there spread-eagle on his back. Mac came up and licked his face – that was the only time he giggled all day.

We finally got going, and he was out cold within minutes. However, I had to poke him awake, because we were supposedly stopping for gas soon – if he got too much rest before the gas stop, he’d wake up and be too awake to fall back to sleep, but too tired to be cheerful, making for hours of crankiness. So I poked, and poked and poked. And of course, after all this poking, the gas station was closed. In fact, the next several gas stations were closed – it was Sunday, after all. Which is why we eventually ran out of gas just outside Hearst. We were pretty close, so mike started pushing, but gave up after a few inches, and thumbed a ride to the next station. He was back within minutes, but it was enough time for John to wake up, so I let him up for a stretch. We thought we were doomed to cranky baby, but he was asleep a few minutes after we got going again. In fact, during the 12-hour drive he was up for maybe 3 hours total, which was really nice.

He was the happiest kid alive when we got home. He was all smiles as he ran from familiar thing to familiar thing. He chased the cat, and played all his usual games. Even after sleeping for nearly 12 hours, we gave him a bath, and put him to bed, where he slept like a log for the whole night.

We took him to daycare the next day, where he squealed with delight at the sight of his friends, and couldn’t get into the toys fast enough. And that’s kind of where the happiness ended. We thought he was over the cold, but the next day, he woke up soooo sick. He was coughing and wheezing. No hives this time, thank goodness. It was just a cold, but a bad one. He had a bit of a fever, and was pretty sluggish. I felt terrible making him go to daycare day after day feeling so cruddy, but I had no choice.

Since we got back, things have been pretty uneventful. We didn’t bother with Christmas lights this year. We were just too busy. We did get a tree, though. We decided to make it a family event, and go back to the same farm we went to last year. John, however, wasn’t quite up to it. I find after a week at daycare, he’s pretty wiped, so Saturdays are usually sleepy days. But we packed him in the car anyway, and he was asleep by the time we got to the farm. In fact, he dozed, with his arms wrapped around mike and his head on Mike’s shoulder, almost the whole time we were there. So, to make his poor little life a little easier, we just picked up a pre-cut tree and headed home, rather than drag his little body all through a field. Besides it was cold out. We didn’t feel like walking through a farm, either. He caught his second wind when we got home – he was very excited about the tree going up. He poked at the branches and giggled for a long time.

It actually stayed undecorated all through Christmas. Mike had to work Christmas day, but has two days off in a row during Ukrainian Christmas, so we figured we’d do it all then. I don’t really feel like doing it then either, but whatever. Bah humbug.

Mike wanted to go to church this year, so we did. We went to the early service – the one for families, obviously. We went to the united church down the street. It’s massive! So many people! John had a great time – he got lots of attention. All the old couples came up to meet him and say hello. They loved his name (most of them were named John too) and all the ladies loved the red hair. John could sense that this strange new event was clearly all about him, so was “on” to the delight of everyone. He boogied to the hymns. He spent most of the service smiling and waving to the two couples sitting behind us. After a while, he got adventurous and crept to the edge of our pew, where he was met with a sea of adoring, smiling faces across the isle. Our little celebrity walked along the red carpet, waving and smiling, and was so entranced by the attention, he walked face-first into a pew, but shook himself off, and just kept on smiling and waving to anyone who’d look his way. Then, came a round of peek-a-boo with the old couple behind us, as he’d coyfully peek around the pew, only to dart back, all a-giggle. Eventually, he decided to explore. He ran around the back, until he came across a one-year-old, doing the same thing. So the two of them chummed around together, playing with the tree lights, and climbing on furniture, until the service was nearly over. We managed to lure John back to us right at the end, when the candles were lit – he couldn’t resist the flame. Once it was over, it was time to bid farewell to his adoring public of little old people, who flocked to see him off. He gave them the thrill of a wave goodbye, which they thought was very cute.

I was a little embarrassed by having all those people see him, because he’d just had his first haircut. Mike decided enough was enough, and got out the scissors and an electric razor. He let me do the first snip, but then went at his head with wild abandon. He used his beard trimmer for most of it, and anyone who’s seen Mike’s beard knows it doesn’t trim very short, so it was actually working out alright, until Mike decided to take the attachment off for some reason. He said he was trying to get some stray hairs, but wound up nicking John’s head. He now has a big bald spot in the back, which looks rediculous. Other than that, it’s a little jagged in some places, but overall it’s not a bad job. No-one seemed to notice – at least no-one said anything.

We decorated the tree on Boxing Day. I strung the lights, while John hung balls. As a result, we had balls clumped at the bottom of the tree, because that’s only as far as he could reach. He had lots of fun helping, but his favourite part was the official lighting. I got a squeal and a big applause from John!

John is getting very communicative these days. He doesn’t “say” things, per se, but he can understand most of what we say and has started answering yes or no to questions, which is making life much more fun. If he’s getting a little cranky, he can’t tell us if he’s tired or hungry, but I’ll ask “Are you tired?” “Na” “Are you hungry?” “Yeah!” so then I know to get him a snack. He’ll give accurate yesses or nos to whether he’s tired, hungry, having fun, or is done eating and wants down. That’s about as detailed as we have things so far – but it’s the basics, which makes life a little easier.

However, he uses this power for evil as well. He’s starting to get a little cheeky in his old age, and he’s learning how to press my buttons. Bedtime is the big battleground right now. He doesn’t fuss up, but he knows he’s supposed to go to sleep, so he fights to stay awake, and goofs around. He’ll pull my hair and laugh, or he’ll hit me and giggle, or he’ll squirm or bounce – anything but settle down. The other night, I said, “OK, I’m putting you in your bed now,” and he grinned, shook his head, and said “NO!” He was just trying to push my buttons – I could tell from the grin. So I called his bluff and put him to bed like I said, which didn’t make him very happy. I don’t think he was expecting me to do that, because after I left, he sobbed big sad sobs, like real sobs, for a long time. So I went back and cuddled him to sleep, as he wiped tears off his face –his whole face was soaked from just a minute of crying, which made me feel really bad. But the bed process was a little easier the next night. I think he learned that if he really wants to cuddle at bedtime, he can’t pull my hair or horse around.

We don’t have any plans for new years. Both mike and I are off for Monday, but John’s going to daycare anyway. We need a day to sleep, and I have to go see my therapist. Woohoo. I’m really not looking forward to it. We’ve dealt with a lot of stuff, but now she wants to rewind all the way back to the first miscarriage. Ugh. She wants to do this exercise called “viewing” where I have to pick a point where the “trauma” started, and a point where I think it ended, and relive the whole event out loud, frame by frame, in graphic, gory detail. I really thought I was over the miscarriage – I hadn’t even given it much thought lately - but I started bawling just trying to decide on a starting point, so she said we’ll do it next time. She didn’t think we had enough time to get through the whole story in detail, and it’s really damaging to leave mid-story, so I have a full appointment on Monday morning to purge everything I can remember. She says it’s a miserable process, but insists I’ll feel better afterwards, because I keep repressing things, which will just keep resurfacing until they’re actually dealt with. Whatever. So far, just thinking about having to do it makes me upset. So obviously, she’s right that it’s still a problem, but I hope she’s right that this will help. I don’t see how dredging it all back up will help. I’m a firm believer in repression. But I guess she’s the one with the degree.

On the upside, I have an appointment with a gynocologist in a couple of weeks, to see what’s going wrong. It was actually made months and months ago, before I got pregnant, on the assumption that I wouldn’t be able to get pregnant on my own again. My doc never cancelled it, thank goodness, and he said he’d give her a call and tell her what happened, so she can run a whack of tests and see if I need any help holding on to a pregnancy. He admitted my condition is beyond his level of expertise, especially with all the new research that just came out. It used to be that people with PCOS were put on the pill when they didn’t want to get pregnant, and clomid when they did, and that was it. Now, it’s actually “treatable”, but it can be pretty complex. It really does require a specialist, so I’m glad he held the appointment for me – otherwise I’d be waiting for six months. As it is, he warned me that she might send me straight on to an endocrinologist, which will be another six-month wait. Hopefully, she doesn’t do that.

John is at home with Dad today. He’s been with a new sitter all week. Our regular one of course had Monday, Tuesday and Friday off, but asked for last Friday, and all of this week off, because friends of the family were killed in a horrible car accident just before Christmas. They were coming back from a hockey game – their sons were on the same team. The hockey mom hit a patch of drifting snow, lost control, went into the other lane, where they were broadsided by an oncoming SUV. All four people – the mom, two kids and the kids’ cousin, were killed. The driver of the SUV isn’t expected to live, but his three passengers should be OK, though all are still in hospital. A lot of the team members actually saw the accident, and one of the dads actually saw the bodies. This guy’s a pro fire-fighter, but he apparently turned as white as a ghost when he came away from the scene – he didn’t know when he approached the car that he’d know the people inside.

So obviously, we gave her the time off. The hockey league put the team members – who were 13 – and their parents into group counseling, and they’ve been spending lots of time together as a group, to try to work through it, so they really needed that time as a family. For the kids, they had a friend killed right in that invincible stage of life, and the parents are dealing with a friend’s death, as well as dealing with grief in their kids, as well as the guilt that they could be putting their families at risk over a game. It’s been really hard for everyone, and lucky me had to do the article. The funeral was on Wednesday – all of the hockey families went, and the team went together in their jerseys.

We have a back-up sitter in town here, so we took John to her for the three days, which he really enjoyed. She’s on disability, so she needs the money, and we needed a sitter, so it worked out for everybody. John loved it there – he was spoiled with lots of turkey and sweet potatoes and brownies, and she has a little terrier dog, named Rufus, which he loves. He put on a lot of weight while he was there! She took him around shopping and things, so he got out to see the sights every day, and got to see lots of people. She even took him swimming at the Y! I found him a cute little pair of blue Elmo swim trunks at the Goodwill, and we found those swimming diapers, so he was set and in high style for his first trip to the Y. He didn’t like it at first, she said. He seemed a little overwhelmed by all the screaming kids, so she settled him down, and went to a quiet corner instead, and he really enjoyed it after that. They have these big rubber ducks there that little kids can ride around in, so she let him ride in one, which he really liked. He sure slept well after that! So it was kind of a nice holiday for him, but I think he’ll still enjoy getting back to his regular routine at his regular place, with the regular kids that he’s used to. People who meet him for the first time think he’s so outgoing, but a lot of it is a show I think – he really does best in his little world, with his little routines and patterns, with new things thrown in now and then just to keep it interesting. Though, who isn’t like that?

Anyway, I had better go. This post is way too long! My apologies to anyone who sacrificed the time it would have taken to read the whole thing. But, as a consolation, here’s another picture!

catching a ride on Dad 

This was john in the fall, helping me rake leaves 

a little brag...

I have to share - I'm so proud!

For the past couple of weeks, I haven't been able to nurse John to sleep. He'll nurse to groggy, then lie awake, usually quietly singing or babbling in my arms. No amount of rocking or shushing has been able to lull him to sleep. So I started just putting him in his crib and leaving - there was nothing else I could do. Of course, he would wail piteously. We'd wind up each night with him standing in his crib, clutching me, while I tried to calm him down. But eventually, I'd say good-night, give him a kiss and go to sit on the steps to listen to him cry himself to sleep.

It took about 10 minutes the first night. But every night, there's been less and less fuss. A few nights ago, it became aparant the wails were just for show - he fell silent the second the door closed behind me.

Well, last night, he made a breakthrough! I did the whole little ritual, just like normal. I sang him his favourite song while I nursed him. Then we cuddled for a few minutes. Then I put him in his crib. He clung to me, while I rubbed his back. Then, I bent down, kissed his check and said good-night. THEN, instead of crying and stomping, like he has been, he turned his head and kissed my hand - a first. Then, clutching his pink security blanket, he laid down in his crib and shut his eyes!!! I gave his head a stroke and left the room - not a peep! How amazing is that!?

I hope it's the beginnings of something!

Update

An older photo - just after John's Birthday. It's my new favourite - it's my desktop at work right now.

Ok - it's been a while. I can't even remember everything that's happened with John since the last update.

John got my flu after all. We were sick together, though he had it much worse than me. He apparently had an allergic reaction to the virus, which caused him to break out into hives from head to toe. It started out as just a little redness on his cheeks. I thought nothing of it, because he was drooling, and his nose was running, so I thought it was just from that. But then he got chills, and started shaking and turning splotchy and blue, so I ran him a really warm bath. It did the trick - he was fine. But that's whe I noticed the rashes all over his body. After a couple of hours, the rash had developed into blistery things all over his face, and his eyes were swelling shut, so I called the doc. The nurse said it was chicken pox, hands down, no question. When I asked if he could have caught it from the chicken pox shot, which he had just gotten, she said better bring him in, and it turned out to be hives. A few days on Baby Benedryl, and he was as good as new, but he had a bad cough for some time.

He's learned a new word from daycare "uh-oh!" He went for weeks saying it all the time. he'd drop stuff from his high chair just so he COULD say it. It's toned down a little, but it's a pretty permenant part of his little vocabulary.

Mike has been trying to teach him to call me Megan, which has been pretty annoying. I was home with John one day, and went upstairs for something. John stood at the bottom of the stairs, and clear as a bell called "Me-gan!" I've been working to counter it, and I am now "Mommy", which is close enough to Megan that he's switched over pretty easily. Sometimes he'll still call me Mama, but usually only when he's upset.

Cat Man has struck again, leaving a dozen or so cats in our basement. I have to take John down there now and then to get something from th freezer or switch the laundry, and he almost always points and says "kitty!" Or more like "kahtee." It's a huge relief, because i just interviewed the parents of an autistic boy, and he does all the same things as John, in terms of how he plays (putting stuff into buckets, sorting, stacking, etc) and he also didn't have many words by this age, which John doesn't either. I've been assured by Alice that he's normal, but it's nice to hear a consistent word from him.

John had a really fun time with me out on assignment the other week. we went to get pictures of school kids out raking leaves in the school yard. John got right into it. He flung his little body onto the pile of leaves, picked up a huge arm-ful, and then put them into the yard waste bags. It was so cute! He had such a look of pride on his face, like "I'm making a difference!" All the parents thought it was cute. Until we had to go, that is. He would have happily stayed and helped, but I had other, less exciting assignments to go to, so I had to pick him up and leave, which made him howl. The next assignment was a church bazaar, which wasn't early as much fun, followed by a halloween party, which was only made fun by the pumpkins, which he kept trying to steal. (That was after he recovered from all the scary costumes, and let go of my leg.)

Of course! Halloween! I'll need to download my fall photos. John was a tiger!!! I found a great costume at Value Village, which was miles too big for him, but it just made him look cuter - he was a big ball of fake fur.

We had him trained, after the first few kids, to put candy into everyone's bag. He got right into it. After a while, he'd see kids coming towards the house, and he'd grab a huge handful and run to the edge of the steps to wait for them.

We took him out towards the end of the evening. We got a little pail, and went to the neighbours. A shut-in lives across the street, so her daughter asked us to come in and show off John. She thanked us profusely, because it really lifted her mom's spirits to see how cute he was. Then it was off to the Jones' (not their real names - that's just what we call them) Mrs Jones always dresses up as a fairy, and decorates the house out of some magazine. They have a dog, which John loved (he has a dog, Nike, at daycare, which is bigger than me). He kept petting the dog, and then took chocolate out of his bucket and gave it to the dog. Next, were neighbours we don't know, but they were watching us at the Jones, so we thought it might be rude not to go, so we headed there. They had a 10-month-old baby girl, and John was smitten. Every time she'd babble, John would giggle and do his shy turn-away thing. After those three houses, he'd kind of had enough. He was getting crazy hyper - though maybe Dad feeding him Kitkats for dinner had something to do with that.

After that we went to show him off to our riding president and his wife - they're like surrogate parents to us. He always does halloween in a big way - he owns a DJ business, so he gets out the sound system on the lawn, and howls at kids as they walk past. People come from all over just to see his house. So Mike and Jim sat out in the sunroom and handed out candy, undoubtedly talking politics, and Joan and I played with John inside. She had a miscarriage when she was my age, so we had a talk about that, which kind of helped.

John has become quite the flirt. I took him to the grocery store to pick up a few things, and he flirted with the checkout girl. He does this thing with his eyebrows - he kind of wiggles them up and down, which looks like a come-on. Well, this girl leaned over to John and told him he was the cutest little boy she'd ever seen, and that sent the eyebrows a-wiggling. She laughed, which made him laugh, and then she'd look back, and he'd wiggle them again. They played that game the whole time I was in line.

That was a while ago, though. He's not much of a charmer these days - he's cutting molars, which has made him feel pretty miserable. I didn't even know until they had actually popped through. He grabbed my finger, jammed it in his mouth, and bit down hard - there they were. Two at the same time. It explained a lot. He had been having lots of trouble sleeping - he was up screaming every night. I didn't have any clue it was teething - we thought it was still because of the flu, because he slept in our bed through most of his flu, so we thought he was still feeling yicky. Who knew? So we've got him on a pain management strategy of finger-knawing and Tylenol, which seems ot be working out fine. He's sleeping though again, and is much, much less clingy and hyper-sensitive.

We're re-arranging our kitchen ot be John-friendly. We should have done it a long time ago. It's making a huge difference in everyone's quality of life. Now John isn't hearing No! everytime he reaches for something, and I'm free to cook, instead of watch him. We used to have shelves on one side, which he would just unpack onto the floor. And then we had a cupbourd filled with old bottles of cleaners, which he really wanted to explore, so I'd have to hold my foot over it the whole time I was in there, hoping he'd lose interest and go unpack the shelves instead. Either way, there were big messes, and many tears shed. Oh, and the cat food was still in the kitchen. He enjoys feeding the cats, by taking handfuls of cat food and putting them in the dish. But he'd also put handfulls in the garbage, the water dish, on the shelves, stuffed in corners...And then he'd take the catfood filled water and dump it all over his head. Needless to say, cooking was quite the experience in our little kitchen. Now, the catfood is upstairs, in a place he's not allowed into. The shelves are gone - the stuff has been moved to the pantry. The chemical cupboard had been scoured clean, and filled with tupperware. Where the shelves usedto be, we're working to find a chalkboard of some kind, so he can draw and play while I cook. He loves the chalkboard at daycare, so we thought he might like that. So far, it's working out great. He loves that he has access to "the forbidden cupboard" and he likes to play with all the plastic stuff in there. He's much happier and more relaxed. Just can't wait to find a chalkboard!

Anyway, I had better get going. I have a lot of cleaning to do, and we're going to Jer's for dinner in a few hours. I need more hours in each day. There's never enough time.

I know I know,

I need a new picture. I have a bunch at work - I just keep forgetting to e-mail them home.

Thanks for the name inspirations, Adrian. We'll add them to the list, but they're about as far from Joan as possible, so i don't think Mike will approve. I'm not big on Joan. Anything but Joan!

Not too sure about this new baby anymore. The flutters have stopped, and I had some bleeding and achiness on the weekend. I called the on-call doc, and he said it may be the beginnings of a misscarraige, or it may be nothing. I'm just supposed to keep an eye out, and he gave me a number of possible scenarios, and what to do in each case. Hopefully, it's nothing. The bleeding stopped later the same day, which is probably a good sign. The flutters, I know I'm not supposed to worry about - it's really early to be feeling them anyway. They don't come everyday this early on, no matter what, and it could be kicking the back right now, or hovering in the middle, or something like that, where I can't feel it. I have an appointment next week - hopefully he'll be able to find the heartbeat again.

John's doing great. Not sure what we're doing about a snowsuit, Gram. He has one my aunt sent him last year that actually still fits. It has snap-on booties, though, but all my online moms say i need real snow boots. Problem is, i can't find snow boots in his size. I don't even know what size he'd be, but everything out there looks too big. Maybe I'm just looking in the wrong place? The snowsuit won't fit him for the whole winter - it fits him right now, so it won't last more than a couple months. What he could use right now is long-sleeved shirts, if anyone stumbles into any. The goodwills and used stores have been picked clean, it seems. It's getting too chilly for short sleeves, though his babysitter keeps the place pretty warm - she wanders around the house in bare feet and shorts.

I have a bad cold - kind of the reason I'm writing. I can't talk. I have actually lost my voice. I thought that was a myth. It was completely gone this morning. If I tried really hard, I could make a few squeaks. Mike thought it was hilarious. He figured he'd be calling in sick for me for sure, but by the time I left for work, I could be more or less understood for a few minutes at a time. But after that, it all breaks down and i can just whisper, and it gets to be very, very painful. It feels like I'm yelling at the top of my lungs just to get anything out, and I must be doing damage when it gets to that point, because my entire throat has gone numb otherwise, so to feel that much pain through the numb is probably a bad sign. It was fantastic for doing interviews today. Oh, and I've lost a good chunk of my hearing too - everything's a little fuzzy and muffled. Yup, deaf and dumb. How great is that? So, I'm sitting in silence now, and just writing, because I figure that's about all I can do without causing damage to my vocal cords. Thankully, tomorrow is production day - although I do have to drag myself to work, with luck, I can just sit at my desk and lay out or proof pages all day - no talking or listening required. Maybe after that I can take a sick day, if I'm still feeling this sick.



At least John hasn't gotten it!!! (knock on wood)

well baby...

John had his well-baby check-up today.

He's huge! He's grown more than two inches and three pounds since his first birthday. At that check-up, he had grown a couple inches as well, but only two ounces. The doc said not to worry that one time, but if the same growth rate happened again at this check-up, he'd call a pediatrician in to assess him.

Thankfully, that wasn't needed! He's 25 pounds now, and stands about two feet nine inches tall.

He got two shots as well, which I wasn't expecting. One I can't pronounce - have no idea what it was for. The other was chicken pox, and he gave me a choice on that one. It's kind of a controvercial one - I'd heard that it wears off when they become teens, then they catch it and it's much, much more severe.

The Doc said that isn't true at all - it gives lifelong immunity. He may still get shingles, but you can say that about anyone who's had chicken pox. And even if the vaccine doesn't work, he'll get such a mild dose of chicken pox, it won't be a concern. He said it's been a routine vaccine in Japan for more than 25 years, and the adults who had it aren't getting chicken pox, so it's proven to be an effective vaccine. It all sounded good to me, so I said OK. I'm sure the anti-vacine lobby will be very disappointed in me, and will accuse me of helping to fuel some drug-resistant super-bug, but at least John will be able to keep up on his school work during that week or two when everyone else in school is home sick with chicken pox.

A fun thanksgiving

Way too cold to do this now! This is from Mike's parents' visit - they took him, with a cold, to the splash pad in the park. Though the fun probably did his cold more good than staying cooped up inside.

Well, I haven't updated in a while, so I guess I should have lots to say.

John has been very blue lately. Mike has been transfered to London for two weeks, and John is clearly in distres over it. It seems there was a huge wave of resignations over the strike out there - lots of bitterness - so they had to bring in a huge crew to help them catch up. He gets crazy overtime, gets to live in a hotel, and gets a cash per diem way larger than what he could possibly ever use, so it's like a cash bonus. We thought it would be great for us, because the daily grind of him working 80 hour weeks, and me full time, and trying to do everything myself was really wearing both of us down. I miss him and all, but life is easier for both of us - I don't have to eat dinner at 10 p.m. He doesn't have to wait for the bathroom, and he gets a big hot breakfas, including eggs and pancakes complimentary at the hotel. He's in heaven, and I'm getting more rest, so it's good for us.

John, however, is not so thrilled. He's spent the last week wandering aimlessly around the house yelling "Da!...Da!...Da!" Clearly, he's searching for Dad. Times when they normally play are the worst. In the mornings, Adrian comes down the stairs and goes for work, usually while I'm dressing John in the living room. When John hears the footsteps coming down, the gets so excited! He tears away from me,and runs, often buck naked, up to the glass door, which blocks off stairs going up. As the footsteps come closer, he gets more and more excited. He jumps up and down. He squeals. Then, he sees that it isn't dad. His face falls. His body slumps. He wails. It's just miserable to watch.

For the first week, he wouldn't sleep. He woke up in the night, and clearly wanted to be held, so I'd bring him back to bed with me, only to have him get even more upset, because Dad wasn't in bed, like normal. Mike thought it might help to explain to him where he was, so I tried, and the second I said the word "Dad," John jumped up, his face aglow, and tore into the den, where Dad can normally be found. He found an empty chair and came back screaming.

Thankfully, Mike was given Sunday off. He got home Saturday evening, and they spent plenty of time cuddling, which made John's day. On Sunday, we spent the whole day together. They played hide and go seek in the morning (John's favourite game). At noon, Jer and Tiffany picked us up, and we stopped by the World's Fair. We were only there for a half hour or so - just long enough to see the chickens! You had to see John's face, as Dad showed him all the different kinds of chickens and ducks and roosters and geese and pidgeons. His mouth hung open and i don't think he blinked the entire time!

Then, we went to a town near London, for Thanksgiving dinner. There was a 12 month old girl there, which was pretty fun! John hasn't seen a baby younger than him in a long time - both kids in daycare are older. It was pretty fun watching them interact.

Before dinner, they were both happy exploring. John, true to his ways, collected pine cones for us. First he brought them to me. Then, when I had about 7 of them, he transfered them one by one to Mike, who was stuck holding them all. Not to be outdone, I eventually got a handfull of dead grasses he had collected for me. For those who haven't seen it, John is a great collector of like objects. When we walk home from the store, he stops to pick up leaves. During our last trip to the park, twigs were the "it" item. Other parents look at him very strangely, but I think it's quite bright of him to pick out all the same things like that. I was very impressed by the pine cones, because there weren't many of them, so he really had to hunt. He'd be a hoot at an east egg hunt, but knowing him, he'd come back with a basket of dandilions or something.

After dinner, I brought out the toys, and was an instant baby magnet. It was so funny watching them. John dumped all of his Duplo out on the floor, and then, instead of, you know, maybe building something, they each started this mad scramble to collect as many pieces for themselves as possible. Then they played with the pieces they had each collected, but were not at all happy playing out of the same pile. Then the larger toys came out and the same thing happened. They played tug-of-war over the phone many times. At one point, John saw Kylie going for the phone, so he picked up his little bead thing - the one where you have to push the beads along the wires. He actually gave that to her - put it right on her lap - and took the phone for himself. It was hilarious. It was a very primal form of play, I guess. Whatever looked like the most fun at that instant, both had to have.

We headed home, and Mike spent that night here too. He headed back early the next morning. John's taking the separation much better this week. It's like he understands that dad still exists, and he's coming back eventually, just like he came back the last time.

John is becoming quite bright. He can understand some of the things we say. Like, I say, take this to dad, and he does. Or bring me your cup, and he does. It's just little things, but we think it's pretty impressive. He has a small vocabulary of his own, but it's hard for anyone but us to understand him. He says baby, cat, hi, bye-bye and red, and what I think is down. Mike taught him red. He doesn't use them all the time, but they do come out. He copies our tones, which is really cute. He'll pick up one of his books and follow the words with a finger, jabbering gobbledygook, but in the same sort of rhythmic tone Mike and I use when we read the stories. It's so cute! He's very big on books right now. He likes to turn the pages and point at the pictures. One is a book of nursery rhymes, including Humpty Dumpty. I read it to him, and pointed out Hunpty Dumpty in the picture. Then he flipped to the front cover, where there were pictures of all the characters in the book. I asked him to find Humpt Dumpty, and he pointed right at him! Isn't he smart?

He's developed a bizarre obsession with one particular blanket - his pink knitted one. If he's fussy, I pull out this blanket, and he settles right down. He pulls it around the house, wherever he goes. He won't sleep without it. This is normal, right? It came out of nowhere, and it's a blanket he hasn't used very much in his life until now. He just pulled it out of the clean laundry pile one day, and they've been together ever since. Very strange, but I'm going with it for now. It appeared at the same time that Mike left, so I'm thinking they might be related.

On the new baby front, all seems well. For those who don't know, I'm due April 4. Mike was a little bothered at first that it's so close to his own birthday, but now he seems to think it's kind of cool.

I can feel the baby move now, which is a huge comfort. Every couple of days, I get a little flutter. Now and then I'll get a really big flutter, or lots and lots of little flutters, but mosly just a tiny flutter here and there. I didn't tell Mike at first, because I didn't think he'd believe me, and say it was just gas like last time, but he was actually really happy when I finally did tell him. And it's not gas! I know the difference from experince now - this is most definitely the baby.

Now the dreaded hunt is on for a girl's name that we both like. Mike is still stuck on Joan, but he has yet to find anyone else who likes it.

I need to know women's names on my side of the family - I know grandparents, but we need great grandparents, great aunts. Anything back there to help broaden the pool a little. Anyone? Names please!?

Anyway, I had better get going. John has found his way into a closet, and who knows what he may encounter in there.

It's alive!!!

Just a quick note - John and I both had doc appointments today. John's ear has healed. Again. And the baby is still alive! The doc was able to get a heartbeat with the little dopplar thingy. It was actually really loud! That's a huge relief. I joined an online pregnancy group as soon as I found out I was pregnant, and I'd say we've lost half our members. Some had miscarraiges, but for a lot of them, the baby just died, without them knowing. So it's nice to know I've made it through the first trimester without that happening.

I was joking with Mike last night that I should request an "unassisted home birth." They seem to be all the rage these days. No doc, no midwife. Nobody. Just the woman in her bathtub, while her husband holds her hand. Not for me, thanks! It's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Well, the doc had forgotten our discussion last time about how I wanted to deliver at Mac, with an OB, just like last time, so he asked again what I wanted. I told him about how we were thinking of scaring him by requesting an unassisted home birth. He just chuckled and said if I were actually wanting it, he'd be fine with it!!! Ack!!! He's very, very different from my last doc, who lectured me every month about the "granola people" who use midwives instead of OBs, or give birth anywhere but a hospital. And don't get her started on the masochistic freaks who "insist" on breastfeeding!

And then there were all the horror stories. Babies born alive, but without brains. Babies strangled by their cords. Moms who bleed to death on the delivery table. Yeah, I looked forward to those visits soooooo much. Much nicer this time around.

It's out!

Ok - it didn't work. He's supposed to be holding up a sign that says "I'm going to be a big brother." But he wouldn't hold it up. Not that it's a surprise to anyone anyway! Mike has certainly made sure of that!

I finally told my editor that I'm pregnant, which is why I can finally bring it up here - I think there may still be a few people from Burlington who check here now and again.

She took it a lot better than I was expecting - she's stressed, but happy for us. She told me she wasn't going to tell anyone else, but, true to her reporter nature, within minutes of me stepping out of the office, she had told the other reporter, and the managing editor. LOL! Fine by me! I certainly wasn't looking forward to telling any other managers, so I'm glad she took care of it.

One of the ad reps said she knew, because I'm starting to show. And now, the morning sickness has set in (isn't it supposed to END about now?!) so I think I told at the right time! I think the morning sickness is just from being sick. There's a cold going around here, and it's one of those long drawn out kind of colds. It just won't completely die, and it's thrown everything out of whack. John got it too. It gave him an ear infection, or at least brought back the ear infection he had before. Yup, he's on his second round of antibiotics already! It's horrible. feel like such a terible mother, because I didn't take him to the doc right away. I thought it was just the cold, but he just wasn't coming right. But he wasn't screaming or anything, like the last time. Just kind of droopy, but still smiling and playing through the day. The doc said it was very red and enflamed.

Well, he's feeling better now! He's a big ball of energy! I had to go to the grocery store after work. I got a cart, and put him in, but he'd have none of that!! He was not only going to walk, he was going to help push the cart! He grabbed the basket underneath, and helped me push the cart through the entire store, waving and smiling to everyone we passed! It was pretty funny - until he became entranced by the candy corn. I had to pull him away several times; he had a tantrum. I had to leave without cheese. It was very sad. I hate tantrums, and he's really got the technique down pat. He lays right down on the grounds and kicks and screams! Yup, sweet, mild John, kicking and screaming on the grocery store floor, because mom won't let him run his fingers through the candy corn. It's quite a sight, but no-one stares or anything - it gets mostly sympathetic "been-there-done-that" kind of looks from passers-by. I guess I should start reading up on tantrums, now that he's getting to that age. I read once that I'm just supposed to walk away and ignore him. But if I had done that, he would have gone right back to the candy corn. Besides, he seems a little young for that.

Anyway, I had better get some dinner into the poor guy. Now that Mike's on extended shifts, John eats earlier than we do - he's usually asleep before Mike even gets home.

On the strike front - yes, there's STILL a strike front - the contract remains unsigned. The two local reps refuse to sign it. Mike has banked his full 200 hours already, but he can't pull anything out. Isn't that crazy? I wish they'd just get it over with and sign, so the healing process can begin! The guys are still so furious, and it doesn't help that they extended the scabs' contracts! They actually hired a bunch of them as legitimate techs. The scabs are in the union now. How sick is that?

John and other stuff

John out for lunch with Grandma and Grandpa W, when they visited on Friday. This reminds me freakishly of Mike - he built creamer towers for years after I met him. Thankfully, he's outgrown it. John, on the other hand, probably has a few creamer tower years left in him. (Apparently, he made it five high at its peak.)

John's doing great! He had a fun day with Mike's parents on Friday, and they're planning to take him again when they come back through.

I took him in for a follow-up at the Doc last week - the ear infection is completely gone. Doc, as usual, seemed a little offended that I took him to a clinic, but it was a deadline day - I couldn't get time off that day, and what good does an after-hours on-call doc do for an infection? All he would have told me to do is exactly what I did - take him to a clinic right away. I guess I should make a point of using the on-call service at some point. It probably costs them a lot to be a part of it, and they need billable things to justify it.

Other than that, life is chugging along. John is happy, as always. I wish I had more time to spend with him. We never do anything anymore. The mornings are spent in a rush to get out the door. At night, he just wants to go to bed as soon as possible. On weekends, I'm usually working. He's usually with me, but it's not the same. Mike never sees him. John is always asleep when Mike gets home during the week - overtime shifts have started, and won't be slowing down anytime soon. The new division he was just trained for has a backlog of 800 jobs, and he's not even put there every day. He's still putting people back in service, and servicing people who've been waiting for months for a tech, or who had a scab service them, who made their situation even worse.

Most of the scabs are gone. The first wave to be let go didn't go without a fight. There were reports of vans with loosened wheels - even loose wheels on the private vehicles of regular workers. That seems to have ended, now that they're gone. The last of the scabs will be leaving at the end of the month.

On the political front, Mike and I are being pushed out of our board positions. I don't know why I'm so bothered by it. I've wanted to resign for some time, but Mike has begged me to stay on until the term ends, so I don't cause any disruptions. The end would have been in January, so it's not like I was robbed of oh so much time by being turfed this early. We both had planned to leave in January, and reassess what contribution we wanted to make, whether to join the federal board where we live, go provincial, or take a hiatus from politics entirely. I want to leave entirely - this just isn't a good time to be involved in anything like that. I want to run as far away from federal as I can until the next leadership review/convention. Provincial? I don't know. I like John Tory, but I've had enough of politics for a while.

What's happening is, Mike and I used to belong to our local board. It was a small board, with nice people, and it was part of a larger association, filled with more nice people. It was PC back then. It was a small party, filled with nice people.

Then, two things happened. First, the merger with the Alliance, then, the riding redistribution, which knocked us into the neighbouring riding. We knew both boards, but we enjoyed the company of this one and we were asked to stay, so we did.

It wasn't completely the same, and over the years, the people have changed. It just isn't fun anymore. We have this one guy who's been trying to get Mike out since January. He had wanted to be CFO, and pulled out this obscure, never-followed rule about how an out-of-riding person can't hold executive office. The board chose to ignore the rule for the time being, and elected Mike anyway, which I can imagine really frosted this guy off. I was acclaimed - no-one else wanted to be secretary, from in or out of the riding.

Anyway, the issue kept getting put on the back burner, until just last week or so. This guy wants the riding to be able to take credit cards. He has been very frustrated that it hasn't moved as fast as he'd like - but it's a large financial committment, and he can't expect the board to just rush into it. There has to be meetings, with reports, and debates, and votes. It isn't Mike's fault, but he's been taking it out on Mike, because Mike has been verbal against the idea. He just thinks $40 a month is too much money, and from the way the campaign team was talking (this guy is campaign manager), they only wanted it for one fundraiser.

It finally came to a head, because we had a special executive meeting to approve a cheaper version of credit card abilities - only $5 a month, instead of $40 - we approved it, but after the meeting had officially closed, a discussion began, started by this guy, about how we needed an AGM right away, because he wanted a team in place for the next election, blah, blah, blah. Our out-of-riding status was of course brought up, yet again. So, the regional guy, who was there for some strange reason, decided to crack down on our residency, and now we're out. Well, we can still be board members, but we can't vote. What's the point in that? We can be observers? Ooooooo...thanks.

Anyway, I was kind of relieved to be out - I've wanted out for months. But I want the credit card system we approved to be stopped, because it's a three year term, and a major financial committment for the board to take on. I just don't think it's fair for such a major decision to be imposed by an out-going member, so I asked the decision to be deferred to the next regular board meeting, and from the look of things, that's going to happen. This guy has another way to process crdit cards anyway - there was never a rush for this system. He's just a really impatient, impulsive person.

Well, this guy has the gaul to start e-mailing me! He waffled on about how this had nothing to do with us personally, how it had nothing to do with him at all - it was strictly a party constitution issue, and he hopes we stay involved. HOGWASH!!! He's been gunning for this for months, and everyone knows it. How is it that it happened just days after he insisted that HQ crack down on it? Coincidence? I don't think so.

If he'd just be honest, and admit that he wanted us out, and created a fuss so we would be thrown out, then I'd be fine. But no, he keeps insisting that I don't know what I'm talking about and that he had nothing to do with it. And then he starts telling Mike something entirely different!!! Apparently, this has been planned for months - that there were meetings with select board members to discuss it, and right before the board meeting, he had a "pre-meeting" with who, I don't know. I'm assuming the candidate and possibly even the regional rep, where it was decided that if we voted against the credit cards, he'd raise a fuss, and if we voted for it, they'd keep quiet, until Mike set it up at the bank, and THEN he'd kick up a fuss. However, he felt it was unfair to ignore the rules, just because we were going along with something he wanted, so he brought it up right away anyway. Wow - so principled. Who knows if that's true - he was still mad at us even after we voted yes, because we voted yes to a system he didn't want, and it was too late to use for a particular fundraiser he had planned.

I just wish he'd admit to me - not just Mike - that this was his plan all along, and it had everything to do with him, and not just a coincidence that HQ cracked down at the exact moment that he wanted it to.

AAARGH!!!!!!

In the grand scheme of things, it's so small. He's a horrible, vile troll of a man, who I've never liked or trusted, so I shouldn't be so offended he did this; this is what he does.

I shouldn't care. It isn't my business anymore - they've found someone willing to take Mike's job, and he seems OK, and someone will take my job, Mike will concentrate on Hamilton Centre until the AGM, and life will go on. I was going to retire in January anyway. It's just the way it happened, and all the lies and passing of blame that really has me furious. Argg!

Taking a stroll on the soccer pitch! was assigned to weekend photos last weekend - I usually bring John, because he likes to see all the neat new things. He happily sat and watched a good 20 minutes of soccer. After a while, he got kind of ansy, though. so I let him down from the stroller and he walked away! 

John at the antique tractor show last weekend. They had an antique sawmill set up, which Joh thought was pretty cool - couldn't take his eyes off it.


Hoo boy! Where to start - it's been a while.

Well, let's start where we left off. Car is still acting up - that "misfire" the transmission guy has been getting steadily worse. We're really hoping it's something simple, like spark plugs, or those little wires that always seem to burn out that attach to the spark plugs. We'll get it looked at soon.

We made it to Vicki's wedding! It was a day later than planned, but we did make it, and it was great! It was a beautiful day, and John had lots of fun! At that point, he wasn't walking by himself, but he walked holding someone's hand the whole time. He loved the park - he picked petals off the flowers and wandered around the fountain. He had a blast at the reception too - well, until the bee that is. He was soooo excited. The music was pounding, people were dancing, and now and then, someone would come along and sweep him off his feet to spin around the dance floor with all the big people. After a while, he slipped into overstimulation mode. His eyes and mouth were permenantly open as wide as possible. We've never seen him that happy and excited.

Then, the fun came to a crashing end - he stepped on a bee. He screamed and screamed, and Mike's first reaction was to get him to a hospital ASAP, because his dad is allergic to bee stings. We probably would have gone, if we hadn't realized that we'd actually need money to go, and well, had none.

It worked out OK, though. After a few minutes of sitting on the kitchen counter, surrounded by a sea of concerned faces, he stopped crying. Hs foot swelled a little but he was walking on it 15 minutes later, as though nothing had happened. It still managed to take the wind out of his sails, though. After that, he just wanted to cuddle up. We felt so bad for him, because he was having such a good time, but it made bedtime a lot easier!

He was a relatively good traveller. A few episodes of screaming, but all in all, a pleasant trip, and it was good to see some family again.

We got back on Monday night, and it was right back to normal life the next day. None of us had recovered, including John. He crashed when we got home, and slept in the next day. I had to wake him up, which I hate to do. He was groggy for days. I think all that excitement was a little harder on him than we thought, because now he's sick.

He has his first ear infection. We noticed he just wasn't right a couple of days ago. Acting a little off. That night, he woke up screaming his head off. I brought him to bed with us, and he kind of settled down, but tossed and turned all night. The next day he was kind of off and groggy. And sure enough, again that night, he woke up screaming his head off. It was much, much worse, though. usually, it just takes a cuddle, maybe a few minutes of nursing, and he drifts back off. But that night he was completely inconsolable. Wouldn't let us touch him. Didn't want a toy. Didn't want a drink of water. Pushed everything away and screamed even louder with everything we offered. Eventually, we pulled out the Tylenol, out of desaration. 20 minutes later, he finally settled down and let me rock him back to sleep. Mike, who was clearly much more awake than me through the ordeal, thought it was an ear infection, because he was rubbing one of his ears. I figured it was just from being tired. But sure enough, the next morning he walked around holding that ear, so it was pretty obvious that's what was wrong. We kept him doped up on Tylenol until we could get him into the doctor. Had to wait FOUR HOURS at the after hours clinic, because I couldn't get into our family doctor on such short notice. But, sure enough, he has an ear infection. He's been on antibiotics since Wednesday night, with instructions to take him to emergency if he gets worse, and th family doc if he's not significantly better after two days. It's ard to tell if he's getting better. His babysitter thinks he's still crabby. She says he gets frustrated really easily, and is having trouble settling down for his nap. He even cries when I leave him there, which he's never done. I feel terrible. It's hard to tell if he's getting better. He's kind of out of it, but my editor said that's how babies react to antibiotics in the beginning. It's powerful stuff to them, because they've never had it before. We have a tentative appointment set for tomorrow, in case he's still in distress. he was smiling and playing peek-a-boo tonight, so I'm hoping the dose he had at bedtime will do some good overnight, so I can cancel it.

Other than that, things are great - he's walking!!! Like, actually walking. It's like he just woke upon Saturday and said "I'm going to start walking today." It's lots of fun. For the first couple of days, he spent a lot of time going from Mike, to me, back to Mike, then back to me, and so on, and so on, back and forth. He'd have his arms stretched out, and he'd give us a big bear hug every time he reached one of us. That was less than a week ago, and now he's a pro. He wanders around freely, even without anything nearby to catch him. He can turn corners. It's like he's been walking for months. A mom at the clinic asked how old he was when he started to walk. Her jaw dropped when I told her he'd just started that week. He had lots of lead-up, though, so that's not really fair. He's been cruising since he was 8 months old, and he's been taking a step or two at a time for a while now. It still seems very sudden, though. He still crawls a lot - he's still just a part-time walker, but every day, he walks more and more. I guess I had better get him to start wearing shoes again!

Disaster update...

Things are starting to look up!!!

I just got back from the transmision place. The car is already fixed - it was just a sensor. An "output speed sensor," he called it. Just a half hour wait, and $100, and it's as good as new! Phew! It was fixed by the owner himself. He said we got off really lucky this time - Dynasty's are notorious for transmission issues. I said we know.

He told us to take it in for a tune-up sometime- we've got some sort of a little misfire in the front end, but otherwise he said it's a smooth-running car. Probably just a spark plug or something. Not surprised. We haven't had to change one the whole time we've owned the car, so they're probably due to start going. I guess we'll take care of that once things settle down.

Rotto Rooter guy will be here within an hour to fix the sewer. Another one of those maintenance things that need to be done every year, but was put off until it was too late.

So things are starting to look up! I'm getting nervous - it could be the calm before the real storm.

In case anyone's wondering, yes, I am off work today. Our babysitter took holidays today and tomorrow. We were just going to take Friday off, but once things started to melt down, and someone needed to be available to ferry cars and hire plumbers, and get it all done before we leave for the wedding, we decided I'd take an extra day and save the trouble of finding a babysitter on top of everything else.

Our sewer backed up. When is this going to end!!!

On a positive note, it probably drowned some of the fleas down there.

just a quick note...

It was bound to happen. Our reliable car is no longer.

Our transmission is shot. Yup. Transmission - you know, that really expensive thing.

We're taking it to a specialist's shop tomorrow. We can get three gears, but can't go faster than 50 for now- sure it will get worse with time if not addresed. Hopefully we won't need an all-new one! We're kind of hoping it's one of those "oh, you just needed your system flushed. There's no charge" kind of things.

Our favourites of the 14 cats we babysat. They're gone now, but we rmember them every day, as we pick fleas from our ankles.

It's a shame, really, about the fleas. Mike had actually taken over laundry duty until then. Now, he won't go to the basement for any reason, because he always comes back with about 10 fleas. I might have one or two. I guess he tastes better.

John did the funniest thing this morning! We shared a plate of scrambled eggs for breakfast, and when I brought them out, he started huffing and puffing. I couldn't figure out what he was doing, until I went to give him some, and blew on them to cool them down. He was blowing on his eggs, because he'd seen me do it so many times! Isn't that cute?