more photos

This is the sledding hill across the street in Calgary. Before the warm snap hit, and it got up to +9, turning everything into slush, John and Mike spent a lot of time sledding. John loves it! He likes to go down by himself now, and he laughs like a loon the whole way down. This is the looong climb up the big hill.

Arriving at the bottom of the hill

Even Joan loves to slide!

John of the Jungle - this was taken in Edmonton. He named this plastic plant "Ferny" and was central to many jungle-themed games.

What a cutie. Joan loves playing with John's boots, because if you hit them on the ground, they have flashing lights. Who needs toys!?

Things have been a little uneventful here since I posted last. Mike had three days off, but we did nothing. He got out his map, and I know he was thinking "road trip" but he was wiped, so we just spent time at home and around the city. Got caught up on some niggly chores. The house deal got finalized on Thursday, while he was off, but we didn't even celebrate. It was sort of all very anticlimactic. I think the posession is only exciting for the buyer - picking up the keys, going in for the first time. From our end, it all ended with a voicemail from our lawyer the day before saying everything was finalized. Meh. Now we just wait for everything to shake out - the mortgage has yet to be actually paid out. The utilities are busy calculating final bills. So it will still drag on for a bit longer. But it's nice to know that it's all his problem now! I asked the agent if she knew what he had planned for the house. She said he's planning to fix it all up, but isn't sure if it's a flip, or if he plans to actually live in it. If he plans to flip it, it would be neat to see what he does.

Actually, I guess you could say we celebrated with a trip to the bank to start the kids' RESPs! At long last. We've never had even the prospect of any money to even bother starting it, but now, things should start looking up, so we headed down and opened them up. We had to go get our pension stuff from our previous jobs rolled over anyway, so we figured, why not?

Speaking of real estate, the landlord is getting a bank appraisal on our place next week. The management company called to let us know, and they said "he's doing something with his mortgage." I'm going to think positively, and just tell myself he's refinancing, or something like that. Hopefully, he's not planning to sell. The movers who moved us in here predicted we'd be looking for a new place soon, because typically these little places get sold off for "infill" - where they doze the building and build a bigger, taller apartment block in its place. Hopefully, that's not the case. I don't think I can handle another move really soon!

Kids are doing great! Joan has started playing "imaginary" games, which is fun to watch. She'll reach into an empty box, and pretend to pull something out and give it to me. She does it over and over again. Then, when i pretend to hand her something, she holds out her hand to accept it, and puts it back in the box. She likes to feed me, too. She'll reach out, with a glob of food in her fingers, and open her mouth and say "ahhh", which is her eating signal. If I lean over and open my mouth, she'll pop the food in, and giggle. She spent about half an hour feeding me grapes one night. It was great. But she won't do it for anyone else. She's also started pushing on her bad arm - the other day, she actually hoisted herself up to sitting from lying down using just her right arm! She likes to follow me around the house, now, too. Instead of screaming if I leave her in a room, she just chugs along after me.

John's doing well. He's been having a lot of what can only be called flashbacks. He'll suddenly start talking about something that happened months ago - largely revolving around the move. The other night, out of nowhere, he started talking about the junk removal guys, and how they were cool, and he got to go out and help them. That was almost four months ago!! He talks a lot about the truck ride, and the movers making the house "naked." and watching all the things going into the truck, or picking me up at the airport. He never talks about the bad things - all the memories seem to make him happy. I'm not sure if this is something we should be worried about. When the memories come up, we just talk about them until he's ready to move on. But they just keep coming up, and they're surprisingly vivid, the way he's describing things. He's remembering school, too. He talks about Becky and Sue, his teachers. He talks about certain games they used to play. He talks A LOT about Keira - the one girl in the class. One night, he stormed up to us, arms folded, and announced, "I want to go to Keira's house. RIGHT NOW!" When we asked him who Keira was, he flipped his hand and mumbled "she's just a girl." It was so cute! His first crush, I think. He talks about her a lot. The other day, I had pulled over in front of a mailbox, which was in front of a group of row houses, and out of nowhere, he asked, all excitedly, "Is this where Keira lives?" Poor guy.

Oh, I hear a pitter patter upstairs. Must be John, looking for me, so I'd better go! I promised him a trip to the really big park today, which is six or seven blocks away, across icy sidewalks. Should be exciting. We'll be on foot - our car is out of commission with a flat tire. Mike told John he could help him fix it tonight, which John is soooo excited about. John told me last night that he would need a big lunch today, so that he would be big and strong enough to help dad lift the car up.

I'll be back again soon - I'll try to get some pictures of our place here in Calgary, now that we're a little more settled in.

pictures and more!

These pictures were all taken in Edmonton. The kids, hanging on the couch.

Joan pointing at the toy I was using to get her to smile.

John, in the livingroom.

The kids, sharing some lunch, on the floor.

John took this one - Joan on our bed.

Sorry about the infrequent posts, everyone. Thins are settling down, but we're still busier settling in than I was expecting to be by now. As well, we put the computer in the basement room, so that we wouldn't be tempted to sit online all day, and it's worked. It's like a dungeon down here, so no-one ever wants to come down, me included. John thinks it's scary. I'm always afraid Joan is going to smash her head on the concrete floor, so I try to come when I'm kid-free, like now, which is a rare thing.





Where to start? Let's start with Joan. The Neurology dept nurse called a while back, to see if she had ever had an MRI. So, because she hasn't they're getting one ordered, obviously. Once that's done, we can get in to see the neurologist, and go from there with him. Not sure what else he's going to do. The damage is done. But we'll see. Apparently, from the MRI they can pinpoint exactly what went wrong, where and how extensive the damage really is. Because it's being done at the children's hospital, the waiting list is much shorter - 2-3 months, compared to 6 months to a year for an adult. But that still seemed like a long time to me, so we did some exploring in the private clinic route. It's about $350-$500, depending on the complexity of the case, they can put her under, but according to the lady on the phone, cases in kids as young as Joan are usually rejected for private testing by both the lab and the childen's hospital, so it likely isn't possible. She then tried to transfer me down to someone who wouldn know more, but I got cut off. I've decided to see just how long a wait we're in for before I push it much further - sounds like a long shot, and we might only be waiting a few weeks anyway. Haven't heard back from them on the date yet.



I have yet to hear back from the cardiologist or the physio clinic, so I gave the doc's office a call on Friday. They gave me the number for the cardio clinic. Turns out, they have a 0-6 month waiting list for the pediatric cardiologist, depending on urgency. The triage assessed her to be about the middle of the pack, so we're in for roughly a 2-3 month wait to see the cardiologist, too. Amnd apparently, they made that decision because she eats and sleeps well, has plenty of energy, and is growing at a normal rate. But if that changes, I'm to let the doc know right away, and they'll step her up.



The physio clinic, on the other hand, fell right through the cracks. The receptionist said he made a note to refer her in, but that request was never passed to the nurses for follow-up. She was going to leave him a note to get it recrified, so hopefully, she can get back into physio soon. Even the Hamilton clinic only took a couple of weeks, and this one is apparently even bigger.



So that's Joan in a nutshell. she's doing really well. She's become pretty mobile. if we put her on her belly, she can creep around combat-style. It tires her out, but she can get pretty far that way. Her main mode of travel is the butt shuffle. She basicly drags herself around with her good arm. The therapists warned me that she would do that. they say it's mobility, which makes them feel happier, but it's not ideal, because it just continues her reliance on her strong muscles. I let it go, because now she can play with John, and both of them have a lot more fun. She's also getting much better with her body overall. SHe can get into different positions now - she can get from lying on her back to sitting up fully, with no help. She can get from sitting up, down to her belly as well. She can stretch really far, and lift both hands right above her head. It's really something to watch her first thing in the morning, just as she's waking up - you'd never know there was something wrong with her right side. She stretches and rubs her eyes with both hands, with the exact same movement in each hand, like a mirror image, like nothing's wrong. Her newfound mobility is causing some sibling tension, though, because now Joan can shuffle to John's toys. The further he moves them, the further she shuffles. Gone are the days when he could just put them safely out of her reach!



Thank you to Mike's parents, by the way. We got the package! John was so excited about the playdough! He's been using it to make rocks for his dump trucks since he opened it. That and playdough poops, which isn't quite as pleasant to watch. But,whatever makes him happy, right? John's outfit is very cute. To be honest, we actually neglected her birthday entirely. Not on purpose. But it was the first day we got here, and everyone was tired and crabby. We bought a pie to have a small celebration, but didn't even eat it that day. Yup, her birthday just...didn't happen. We had talked for the first few weeks that maybe we should just have a big party, and say it's her birthday. But that just never happened, either.



John is doing well. He seems really happy here, now. He's still talking about the move, but he talks more about the donut with sprinkles dad got him en route, than anything else. He still says he misses our big house, but he says he really likes it here. "This is a happy house" he says. Everyone is definitely hapier here, so I can see why he said that. We definitely fight much much less. Most of our fights were house related, anyway. So with that horrible experience out of our lives, yes, things have been much happier, and have been even happier still since we accepted the offer. (They take posession on Thursday! Woohoo! We have an appointment to sign the forms with a notary on Monday, then we can wash our hands. The lawyer takes care of everything else. Yay!)





Speaking of John, I've been trying to get him out to programs, to see other kids, now that we're settled in Calgary. We've found one he loves. He askes to go every day. It's a preschool open gym time at the Y. They get out a bunch of gymnastics type mats and spread them around - every time it's a little different. Sometimes, there's trampoline stations, or slide stations. There's basketball and hockey. All sorts of things. He LOVES it! He loves the hockey, especially. Every time he gets the puck in the net, he throws his arms up and yells "I SCORED!" It's great fun for him. One time, they had draped a bunch of big mats over some balance beam type contraptions, to make a big soft slide. I don't think there wee less than 20 kids on it at any given time. John made a friend there, with a boy about his age. The two of them started wrestling on the way down, and that morphed into the two of them rolling down clutched together, yelling "CANNONBALL!" all the way down. Before long, two other boys joined in, and all four of them would land in this tangled, giggling mess at the bottom. It was hillarious! Oh, and on the Thursday program, they close down one side part-way through the program, so that a senior's group can have aerobics at the same time. They put down a partition, but it's just a big curtain, so a lot of the kids like to peek around and watch. Well, mine was not content to just watch. He joined the class! I poked my head around, and there's John, dancing along with a group of seniors. He was pretty good! he was following along with all the steps, and adding a few of his own. I went in to get him, but got shooed out by everyone. The senior next to him told me to leave him "It's ok! It looks like he's having fun!" she said. Even the instructor told me over her microphone that he was okay, they didn't mind. He even got up in front of the class and started leading it beside the teacher! The seniors were all laughing, and John was loving the attention. It was the highlight of his time there. "I got to dance with the big kids!" he said on the drive home. How on earth did I produce such a ham? One time we tried to go wasn't so much fun. We got there, waited in line to pay, got all of our winter gear off, get his socks and shoes off, just touched the door and bam - there was a fire alarm! They told us it was probably a false alarm, so we could just hover in the lobby, if we liked. So I asked John if he wanted to stay and wait, or go, and he chose to stay. It was really pretty exciting. The fire department showed up, and the police arrived, so there were firefighters all in their full garb, and the police as well. By the time they decided it was a false alarm, there was only half an hour left in the program, so we beetled there, but they were already taking it apart. And then, there was ANOTHER fire alarm. So the firefighters all came lumbering back down the hallway, right past us, and that really freaked John out. He turned to me all wide-eyed and said "Mom! We gotta get outta here, before the fire men spray us!" So, we did. I think we'll go again tomorrow. It's only $3.50, and worth every penny. We tried to go yesterday, but the car wouldn't start - we're at the end of another "artcic outflow." But it's ending today. This morning, it was -38 with the windchill. By this afternoon, it's supposed to be +1. I don't get this place. I really don't. But anyway, it worked out really well. Mike talked me through how to start the car (who knew pressing both gas and clutch would work?) By then, it was too late for the Y, but we still needed groceries, so we headed to safeway. Turns out the owner is Chinese, so he had arranged for some dancers to come and put on a Lion Dance for Chinese New Year right in the store. (I thought they were dragons, but they called them lions - those things with the big masks, and two people underneath them, as the legs. There were three of them.) I took John to see, and he loved it! He was a little scared at first, and found the drums a little loud, but at the end, he jumped up and down, clapping his hands yelling "Bravo! Bravo!" He talked about it the whole rest of the shopping trip, all the way home, most of that evening, and even as he was falling asleep. He especailly liked the part at the end when the lions ate the lettuces, and spat out candy.



What else? Mike's work is going well. They're in winter slowdown now, which means just full time. A nice change from Bell, where winters were pretty bleak. They were told it'll pick back up in March, though. It's just a few draggy weeks in February, then the slowdown is over. He's trying hard to impress them, because the company plans to tripple its workforce over the next year - which means hiring four new managers. I'm sure you can see what he's thinking.



Appluing for healthcare has proven to be a real pain in the butt. Turns out, to get healthcare in Canada, you actually have to prove you're Canadian. That's a snap for everyone, but me. I don't have my birth certificate anymore, which states I'm Canadian, despite being born in new Zealand. And Alberta Health and Wellness won't just take my word for it. So I called immigration, and they said i need a citizenship card - that I'll need it for everything down the road anyway, including getting a passport to travel to the states, and foruse with most government agencies, which will slowly no longer accept birth certificates like mine. Problem is, it takes five months to process an application, which means me being without healthcare for six months, because supposedly, OHIP will cut me off at the same time as the rest of the family. That means, paying for all healthcare out of my own pocket, like I'm some kind of foreigner. Hardly seems fair. But luckily, my parents had some documents from when we came over, and when I described them over the phone to Alberta Health and Wellness, they said that should be enough proof to not be a problem. Hopefully, whoever gets our file is lenient! Obviously, I'm still going to get the citizenship card, too, if only to prevent future headaches at border crossings and government offices, and in case they still say no to the documents I DO have. But I'm thinking it really is a slow process - the application package has yet to even arrive!



That's about all I can think of for now. We're pretty dull. We've been glued to the US Primaries lately. We're hoping for Obama. Why can't we have a guy like that running here? I love his speaches. It isn't even my country, and I always feel so uplifted at the end. His one in Virginia last night was amazing. Makes our slate look pretty bleak and lifeless in comparison. Like, our candidate of change is...Stephane Dion!? Not fair!



Anyway, enjoy the new pictures! More to come!

John pooped in his potty!!!!!

Woohoo!!!!

It happened yesterday. I was cooking dinner, and John scooted past, headed for the bathroom. Not an uncommon thing, now that he's peeing in the toilet. But a minute later, he came back, all excited, and squealed "Mom! I did it! I made poop! Come see!!!!"

And sure enough, in his potty was a poop!!!! Woohoo! Of course, then he treated me to the play by play: "I sat down and I squeezed and I squeezed and I squeezed until it was there!"

Until that moment, John insisted on pooping in a diaper. If he didn't have one on, he's insist that I put one on. In Edmonton, he got into the habit of pooping in a diaper, leaning over the toilet, which I thought was progress. But this was a huge leap! I'm so proud!

I think it was inspired by a little incident that took place as we headed out of Edmonton. I had put a diaper on him for the trip, and then, as I was packing the car, he pooped in it. We kind of had to get out quick, because the guy was already there to collect the keys, and he was wearing my last diaper anyway, so there wasn't a whole lot I could do. So he had to go to the car all poopy, and he absolutely hates sitting, let alone being strapped into a car seat, filled with poop. To make matters worse, I then had to haul him through a pharmacy to pick up more diapers, and he hates walking filled with poop. And then, I had to change him in the car, which was loaded with stuff, so he had to lay down on the driver's seat, while I stood outside, with the door open. Then I had to pull down his pants, exposing his nether regions to the biting -38 degree wind, while I wiped him clean. The whole time this was happeneing, he whimpered to himself "I'm a tough guy. I'm a tough guy."

Needless to say, it wasn't a pleasant experience for him, and the whole time I reminded him if he'd used the toilet, this wouldn't be happening. And lo and behold, the next day, he used the toilet!

It's helping that the dipers they had at the pharmacy were all wrong. They have Mickey and Minney Mouse on them, which he despises. He thinks they're too babyish. He's still in diapers at bedtime, and he makes me put them on backwards, because he hates the mice so much. Mike got a kick out of that one. He rightly said if you're old enough to have a preference, you're too old to wear them. But he's very close to being fully toilet trained. Unfortunately, he doesn't much like underwear, either. He says they're scary, because they're too different. But that's just a matter of getting used to them, I think. Not sure he's ready for underwear at nighttime, though. He's woken up dry now and then. I guess if I just go cold turkey on the diapers, he'll learn to hold it overnight, right? I have no clue.

Anyway, better go. Lots to do today. I have lots of errands to run, and I'm trying to get John to the YMCA in time for a preschool open gym time that sounds like lots of fun. He says he doesn't want to go, but I know once I get him there, he won't want to leave! I'll try to download that camera tonight, too. I haven't posted a picture in too long, and I have a whole bunch of them in there.

we're home to stay!

we're home, as in our Calgary home. To stay, as in, until the next temporary transfer. The last of the guys were sent home today - we found out about it last night. Sure is nice to know we're no longer semi-nomadic. At least for now! There was a certain charm to it all, though. Mike felt that coming home on the weekends made this place feel like a summer cottage, and he was definitely right. And it really makes this place feel a lot bigger. After living in a one room, 600 square foot bachelor apartment, this place feels downright luxurious. Like, we have a bedroom. With a door and everything. And a dining table that can seat more than 2. Imagine that!

Just as we were heading out, I got a call from the neurology dept at the Alberta Children's hospital - it was the admissions nurse collecting info on Joan. I'm going to assume they're doing the MRI. The nurse didn't know - she's just admissions, so she has no access to actual files. But she said we'll be getting either a call or a letter to let us know her appointment dates. MRIs are in pretty high demand, so they could very well be months down the road, but a hard deadline is always good. I'll keep you posted. I should be able to update more often now that we're home, with 'round the clock internet access. I even have pictures!

Oh, and the weather you've been hearing about is true - it got to -38 last night - that's even before the windchill. Not fun at all! Even with mittens, it feels like your fingers will fall off after a few minutes. The burn of frostnip is almost instantaneous. It hurts to breathe. It's a little warmer in Calgary. I think it was -29 as we headed into town, arount 11 p.m. I heard it was -32 in the day in Edmonton. The worst I saw it during the day with windchill was -47. And school was still on! Poor kids. Apparently, it's a blast of arctic air escaping over the mountains. They have a name for it, but I can't recall. Should pass by Friday. All I've got to say, is if I ever get the urge to move to Whitehorse, remind me of this week!

doc update

just a quick note, before Mike takes the laptop to work...

We have a doctor! Turns out they really DO have a serious doctor shortage here after all. But we got one, because of Joan's condition - his receptionist agreed we needed one urgently, so let us through.

He's an older guy, but he seems good. He's getting everything underway for us. He's a bit disgusted she wasn't sent to a cardiologist, but she's being sent to one here. They have a special stroke clinic, with a pediatric specialist on board, so they'll do the MRI. They also have a pediatric cardiology clinic here, so he's trying to get her there for an ECG. He said it's best to do everything through the children's hospital, because they know more about these conditions in little kids, so that's where he's trying to get her in. He didn't know much about the physio clinic, so he called the children's hospital while I was there, to find out how to get her in, and they said they'll take her. So now it's just a big transfer of files, and getting everything set up again. A huge, huge relief!

Anyway, better go. He said we'll know about timelines in about a week.

we're still here!

A quick post - it's hard to get online these days, but we're back in Calgary for a day, so figured I'd better log in to say hey. I have new pictures, too, but my camera is here, but the cord is in Edmonton, so that will have to wait, unfortunately.

I guess I'll start with the big news. We sold the house on Monday. We're not very happy - we JUST made enough to cover all the costs. We each have our own way of making it ok in our minds. For me, I just remind myself that we did roll a $25,000 line of credit into the mortgage just a few months ago, so it's like we paid off $25,000 in debt over and above everything else. For Mike, he finds comfort by remembering all the corroded, leaky pipes held together with electrical tape, which are now someone else's problem. The place was a real ticking timebomb. We had smoking outlets, sparking bare wires, wobbly toilets that wouldn't always flush, and a leaning porch, not to mention extensive water damage and a leaking roof dangerously close to collapsing in several places. But our big consolation - we can finally get on with our lives. We don't know anything about the guy who bought it, other than he's paying the full amount in cash, didn't bother with a home inspection, and he wants it February 14.

Back in the west, we're still in Edmonton - Mike just had a day off, and we'd forgotten some things, and needed to check in on the cats, so headed back to Calgary last night, and will probably go back to Edmonton tomorrow morning. This is all getting a little...gruelling. It's disjointing for everyone, all this travel. John can't keep track of where the heck we are.

Edmonton is...different. Neither of us like it. We both remember it as a very classy city, but it's not like that this time. Not sure if we've changed, or the city. They still seem to have the same job shortages, but there are lots of homeless bums skulking about. I keep thinking it's just our neighbourhood, but Mike says it's pretty rough all over the place. They're downright scary. One of them was sleeping in our lobby the other day. Our little unit is right across the street from a grocery store. John and I headed over the night we sold the house to pick up some ice cream to "celebrate", and as we were walking along, some guy came bursting out of the shadows and ran straight up to me. I actually screamed, and started running away. He looked a little shocked - I don't think he intended to scare me. But there are some things you just don't do to women - especially women with young kinds - in parking lots past dark. There's more of a mean streak in Edmonton. The drivers are rude, the people are cold. I really like Calgary - I'd recommend it to anyone. Edmonton - not so much. But it's not for that much longer. Heck, it might end any day now. I'm actually a little annoyed about what's going on with Mike's transfer. Just before they were dispatched, the company gave everyone a call to see what kind of living arrangements they were able to get. Shortly after, all the guys with families were told they didn't have to go - every guy with family except Mike. He's the only one who made arrangements to bring his entire family with him. (Their concern was separating families.) A few days ago, they called a big meeting. All guys except four were told they were being sent back to Calgary. Mike was one of the four. Why? Because he'd uprooted his whole family to be here. If we hadn't gotten the place we did, not only would they have let him stay home, but even if he was sent, he'd be home by now. Five days. Not six weeks, like planned - five freaking days. But the logic is, with only four guys remaining, there should be enough work for those four guys to stay busy. A week of 10 techs made short work of the majority of the backlog, but it's apparently still busy enough to keep a few behind. Telus is doing a huge advertising campaign in Edmonton, apparently.

The kids are doing well. John is really missing school. He keeps asking where the other kids are, and whether he can go to school. It's heartbreaking. But I've managed to find a mishmash of various programs he can go to in Edmonton - through the library and Alberta's answer to the Early Years Centres. Lots of sing-a-longs, puppet shows, story-times, open play times. All free drop-in programs. It's not as good as the best start prgram - nothing can match that program. But at least it's interaction with peers. Mike meets lots of young moms here, and he tells them all about John's school and how great it was. There's no reason they can't put more into early education here. It made such an amazing difference in John. His self-esteem alone really blossomed there. He ended that program so confident and eager to try new things. It was great.

Joan's doing great. She's lots of fun. She's learned to point, which makes communicating a little easier. She's even starting to talk! She's said "No" "Up" "Yeah" and "Eat". I'm trying to get her to use her words more, but it's slowly coming. Just wish she could crawl! Her hand is getting stronger, and she uses her right arm a lot now. But she's not making huge progress. Tomorrow's big job is getting a doctor for her. It's tough without internet, and we had no phone in Edmonton until Tuesday. I met one at a clinic I really liked who was taking patients, but Mike didn't like the sounds of him. (This person will be Mike's doctor, too, so yes, his opinion matters). I had taken her in for what looked like an earache, which turned out to be nothing. He gave her a thorough look, and said her murmer was quite loud. He was really excited to talk about her stroke, and knew all about the condition. He said we might run into problems later, if she's not actually a lefty genetically. Not sure if that's true - no-one else mentioned that, but the therapist did say she may need help with writing down the road, so maybe they're just trying to spare me the worry by not telling me the full story. With all the lefties on my side, it may never be an issue anyway.

We took the kids to see the mountains just before we left for Edmonton. John slept the whole drive there, but the dropped jaw he had when he woke up surrounded by big peaks was priceless. He was speechless for the first few minutes, then finally whispered "It's big." And everyone who knows John knows it would take a lot to render him speechless!

Well, I had better go for now. We have a number for Edmonton now, and when we get back there, I'll e-mail it around. It's hard to keep track of stuff when some things are here, and other things are there. I'm REALLY looking foreward to ditching our two spare homes!

a day at the park

We had a quiet saturday afternoon, so I finally took the kids out for a walking tour of the neighbourhood parks. There's three within a block of our house. Unfortunately, the big one was fenced off - I'm assuming for the winter, due to liability (it belongs to our neighbourhood association). But the two smaller ones were open. Joan slept the whole time, but John had fun, even though he was the only kid there. He took turns on the swing with his imaginary friend Invisible John. (Man, does that kid need a social outlet! Unfortunately, every program in this city that I've seen so far requires potty training. He's almost there. He's in underwear all day now, and if we're home, he uses the toilet to pee, but not to poop. But he wet himself on the way home from the park, without even realizing it until it was too late, so the away-from-home training isn't going quite as well. But it should be soon! Hopefully, we can be done by the time we get home from Edmonton, so I can enrol him in something fun. There's pre-school programs here through the city's recreation dept - once a week type things. There's "pirate adventure" sessions, or crafty ones, or sporty ones, or space themed ones. Lots of things to choose from that I think he might like. I'm going to try to get him into something like that, at the very least. The spring session starts just after we get back.)

John's favourite part of the outing was finding a box of toys marked "free to a good home" sitting outside our neighbourhood community centre. He took a few cool things, and even chose something especialy for Joan, which I thought was very generous of him. My only worry is that now he'll come to associate the parks here with new toys. "The closed park is my favourite park. That's where the toy box is!" he said as we got home.

But anyway - thought you might appreciate some pictures! (Don't be alarmed by no hat. He didn't want it, and took down the hood himself. We supposedly had a little chinook this week, so it's mild - for now.

Riding "the wild animal"

His first time on a tire swing! He thought it was really cool, and told Dad all about it that night.

He liked this, too. But not for long. I think it made him feel sick.

The view from park 2. Our house it just out of view - we live at the base of this big hill. This is actually a leash-free dog park. Some people use it as a sledding hill, but there's an even better sledding hill (no dog poop) just a couple blocks away, with an outdoor skating rink, too. But John was too tired to see it on this outing. Pretty big hills for a little guy. He was pooped by the time we got home.

And just because she's so darned cute, a picture of Joan, taken just before the big move.

we're alive!

Don't have much time - kids should be up soon. But we FINALLY ave the internet up and running, so thought I'd quickly pop in and say hi.

Well, we're in Calgary! The move was stressful, to say the least. Once we added everything up - flights back and forth, u-haul, gas, gas and more gas, we figured out it would have been the same price to hire movers to take everything from point A to point B - and probably much less stressful. If we move back to Ontario, that's how we're going to do it, or so we think now. The packing part was still hard on the kids. At one point, just a couple days before Mike arrived, I was busy packing, and Joan was sitting on the bed nearby. John came up and sat down beside her, gaver her a big hug, then said "Baby, you're my best friend in the whole wide world. Mom is really busy today. Too busy to play. So this isn't play time, or story time. This is work time. But remember, everyone loves you very much." I felt so bad when I heard it, because i think it was less John reassuring Joan, and it was John reassuring himself.

Our trip home to Dryden was delayed by a day to try to get everything in the house squared away. It was three households all going in separate directions, so it was a bit chaotic. But somehow, we managed. And of course, everyone was sick as dogs for the trip. Only John seemed to escape it. I lost my voice. Mike threw up. Joan had a fever. It was all pretty miserable. Mike spent 80 per cent of his time in Dryden in bed, before heading to Calgary at midnight, Christmas night. But they made good time, and arrived the night before my flight even left.

Everyone's fears about John acting up in the u-haul were unfounded in the end. John was so excited to finally see dad after three months apart, I think he would have gladly travelled in a cardboard box with him, just to be able to stay close. He loved the truck! He drove back to house in it with dad, when we first picked it up. Mike said he squealed "the truck is awesome! Yay!!!!" And threw his hands in the air.

Those few days between picking up dad at the airport and leaving on our trip were the happiest I'd seen John in the whole three months prior. I had dragged both kids into the terminal to pick up dad, at 1 a.m. - not the smartest idea. John melted into a wailing puddle on the floor. Another mom helped me out by taking Joan, while I got him to a chair, where we waited for dad. By the time dad appeared, John had fallen asleep, so Mike picked him up to carry him to the car. But he woke up - in dad's arms. I wish i had a camera to capture that smile! it was one of those uncontrollably happy grins, from ear to ear. We were worried that there would be some residual anger against dad once he came back, but it didn't materialize at all. In fact, i became chopped liver. He was constantly elling me and Joan to go away, because he wanted dad all to himslef. "Just me and just dad. Not you and baby!" was the line I heard over and over. One night, Mike and john were cuddling on the couch, and John looked up at dad, and pointed to dad and himself one by one, before cuddling back in - a little secret affirmation of "just you and me". It was very cute.

The packing of the truck was a little stressful. John flip-flopped between being stressed that all of his things were vanishing into the truck, to being worried that other things weren't being loaded fast enough, and might get forgotten. It was a very good idea to have movers for that part. We were able to spend time with the kids, John in particular, reassuring him that everything was really OK. But after the movers left, the real stress started. We had a bit of last minute packing and loading to do, but all of John's things were in the truck already. So he just wandered around, searching for things, getting increasingly agitated. At one point, he went to Mike, all sad, and said "I can't find my games or my toy trunk or the tv." So Mike broke out his laptop, and he and the kids watched Charlie Brown Christmas together. It cheered John up, and kept both kids out of my way, so it was a good thing.

The final load onto the truck was the worst part. It was 3 in the morning. The kids hadn't slept, but Mike was getting ready to go. So we were loading up the last few things. John, who was massively overtired and somewhat confused, was almost hysterical. He sat in the den on our luggage, rocking back and forth, screaming over and over "DON'T FORGET ME!!!!! WHAT ABOUT ME!!!! ME!!!ME!!!" It was heartbreaking, and no amount of consolling could convince him that he wouldn't be left behind. The first time he smiled all night was when I buckled him into the truck, and hugged him good-bye.

Mike said he was asleep within about 5 blocks, and slept to Sioux st Marie, as I recall.

Mike drove all the way through, just taking naps as needed. John was wide awake for one of his naps. He explained that he needed to sleep, so John was going to need to be quiet. And he was! he sat in the space between Mike's knees, and quietly read books. For two hours! Apparently even the second leg went well. Mike was pretty worn out by the time he got to Calgary - he was travelling with a flu after all. And John didn't sleep quite as much. But he was a good traveller. Even John travelled well. On the first leg, she slept in the taxi to the airport, then again for the entire flight, then the entire trip home from Winnipeg. Or so I think she did - i was asleep the entire time too. The trip to Calgary wasn't quite as smooth. She screamed for the entire trip to Winnipeg, and only slept for half the flight. But all in all, a good little traveller.

Christmas in Dryden is kind of a blur, to be honest. We were sick and exhausted. It was definitely nice to stand still for a few days. John had a great time with all his grandparents, and still talks about making great-grandma Evans' bed move. He shows me all of his toys and tells me exactly who gave him each one. Unfortunately, he seemed a little confused by the whole thing, even though we'd explained it so many times. At each house, he'd ask "is this our new home?" When we told him no, he was actually pretty eager to hit the road in search of our new house. He was asking to get back into the truck before Christmas even came. it was sort of sad in a way. I don't think he enjoyed it as much as we hoped, just because he was in limbo and confused.

Even when we got to Calgary, it took him a bit to settle down. We spent a couple nights at Mike's little place, then we moved to the new place - so that's two more places. Just after we got everything into the new house, he asked me "when do we got to the next house?"

But it's been a few days now, and he's starting to settle in. When he says "let's go home" he still feels the need to explain exactly which home he means. "Not our big house. Not dad's apartment. Let's go to our new house!" He and joan share a room here, and he's actually loving that. he hasn't been in our bed since we got here. He has all of his toys in there, and his bed, and his "reading chair and reading light", which is one of the big comfy easy chairs from our attic. It's in there for story time before bed, and he really loves it. I find him in there reading quite often. During the move, he escaped there regularly. If things got a little hairy, he'd announce "I'm going to my room! GOOD BYE!" And off he'd go, and he'd shut the door behind him.

But little does he know, his life is about to be turned upside down yet again! Oh joy. Mike's first day back at work, he got a call from his manager.
"Hey Mike! How did the move go?"
"Oh, it was stressful. But it sure is great to have the whole family together again."
"Oh Mike, I feel so bad for you."
"No no, it's really great. We're finally together. Things are fantastic!"
"Ohhhh Mike."

And that's when his manager broke the news that the entire team is being transferred....to Edmonton....for six weeks.

The pay is the same, and he gets the per diem again, but he has to use it for accommodation while he's there. It will barely cover a hotel room, so really, it's just regular pay. But on the upside, it's all the work he can handle, so it's crazy overtime, which is big money.

The big downside is the family. We just got together. John is just starting to unwind about dad being gone, and is getting used to him going to work each morning and coming home each evening without fail. We're not sure how he'll really cope with another six weeks apart. So we've decided, if we can, we're going to go together. it's not like I have anything holding me here, and John's not in school. My task for today is to find us a place to live. It apparently starts January 11, so I don't have much time. And it could last six weeks, like they say, but it could also dry up after 2 or 3. On the upside, this comapny also does a lot of work on Vancouver island. So he may get transferred there at some point, so the kids and I could have a long tour of the extended relatives, without Mike missing any pay.

Mike was talking about the predicament to one of his coworkers, who said "Welcome to contract work." So I guess this is the norm. They used to shuttle them around with Bell, too, but it was always, always voluntary, and they provided free accommodation AND a per diem, and all the overtime they could handle, so it was a sweet deal. This...not so much. But I guess that's why he gets paid the big bucks.

it kind of sucks for me, too. I'm just settling in too. I like Calgary. I had heard it was a grumpy city, but I don't see that at all. In fact, it's easily the nicest city I've ever been in. It took me a while to put my fnger on what makes these people so different. I thought at first that they just provide excellent customer service. But that's not it - regular people on the street are nice, too. I think it's that they don't have that high-strungedess of Southern Ontario. I thought Hamilton was mellow. And compared to Toronto, it is. But here, it's at a whole other level. People here are so...relaxed. They're polite. People coming down the street smile at you, look you straight in the eye, and say hi. If you're stuck in a line, they'll tell you a story about their life, or play with the kids. Mike says it's like a really huge small town, and it really does feel that way. We're all Calgarians, so we're all like one big family. I had to run some errands the other day, so I had to take the kids to a mall. John was a little overwhelmed by it all. There is SO much money here - a bit of a culture shock coming from Hamilton. Everything in this city is dripping with wealth, including the shopping malls, which are filled with cool decorations and bright shiny things. John kept getting away from me, and when he did, someone would stop him, and direct him back to me, telling him to stay close to mom. I thought that was kind of neat. When we stopped for lunch, I had people offering me their seats, even though there were lots of empty tables, just because they thought their seats would be more convenient for me. If Joan dropped something, someone would pick it up for me, without fail. One guy actually left his lunch, and walked halfway across the food court to pick up a book at my feet, that Joan had dropped. "It looks like you have your hands full." he said, and turned around to go back to his lunch. Mike happened to call when we were just beside the doors to leave, so John was hovering by the door. About six people passed him, and each one said "watch your fingers." It was drilled in so much, that John started saying it to the people passing him. One of the people was this total surfer dude, with the long hair and everything. John told him to watch his fingers, and actually opened the door for him, and it was a pretty heavy door. The guy said "Whoa, you're a strong little dude! You must have eaten your Wheaties today!" John looked so proud! Even the drivers are polite. I haven't done much driving here yet, so I wasn't sure if I was allowed to turn right on a red. So when i was in that situation, I thought I'd better just sit tight, and if people honk, I'll know I can turn. Well, about eight cars lined up behind me, and no-one honked, so I figured, must be illegal. But I asked Mike about it, and sure enough, I could have made that turn. They were just being polite. That's just so...Calgary.

Anyway, better go. I hear little feet fast approaching!
I'll update again soon, now that I have internet!

quick, between chore post

Well, i have a couple minutes, and just don't feel up to washing another dish or packing another box, but both kids are occupied, so thought I'd stop in and update super-quick.


The house still isn't sold, but there's quite a bit of interest on it. We had an open house, and a couple of people from that were very interested, but both felt the price was too high. It turns out that's the common theme from everyone who expresses a genuine interest in our house. So, we've lowered the price. By $15,000. I know it's a lot, and we aren't very happy about it. But if that's what it takes, so be it. We need it sold, like, yesterday. But I think we're going to be pretty firm, and expect our asking price. I think we've compromised enough for these cheap bastards already.

The kids are doing well, but Joan is sick yet again. she's on day two of a fairly high fever. She can't eat, and does nothing but sleep all day, which is what she's doing now. John has a bad cough, and says he's really sick, but the only evidence is the cough, so I think he's exaggerating. Unless he has bronchitis or something, and I'm just being too hard on him. But he has no fever. He's been in full Dr John mode for Joan's flu. He does little check-ups on her, and prescribes her medicine (Tylenol). He strokes her head while she's taking it, and assures her it won't hurt. It's very cute. He's so funny. He decided he wanted to make everybody chocolate milk the other day, so I got all the stuff out for him, and let him have at it. It was hillarious. He mixed his own perfectly. I got a cup of straight chocolate syrup, with a dollop of milk, and even Joan got a tiny splash of chocolate milk in a little glass. She didn't drink it, but I held the cup up to her mouth, to make him feel good. he was so proud! it took me a while to clean up the gooey chocolatey mess it all created, but it's the thought that counts.

The big concern these days is his attitude towards dad. He's so mad! We've had several conversations like this:

"Are you excited that dad's coming back?"
"No. I'm mad at him."
"Why are you mad at him?"
"He hurt my feelings."
"How did he hurt your feelings?"
"Calgary."

The other night, he wanted to read "I'm a Big Brother" - it's a book he likes about a big brother and his baby sister, that my parents sent for him when Joan was born. The last page is the happy family at the park, and he went through each figure in turn, relating it to his own family.

"Look, mom. There's the John, and that's the baby, and that's the mom. That's like you!"
"And what about that guy over there," I say, pointing to the dad. "Who's that?"
Silence.
"Isn't that the dad?" I ask.
"No. That's a big ugly bug."

The teachers at school mentioned today how incredibly happy he's been lately. I mentioned that he's not like that at home, and relayed some of the things he's been saying about dad,and the anger he's been expressing.
"Ah, we've been wondering when that would kick in," they say.
However, he hasn't said a word about it at school. They think he's probably using school as an escape from the chaos and confusion at home - it's a constant he can rely on. Boy, I hate to pull him out of there! He had cheered up when I first told him about Christmas. He spent the next few days saying how much he loved and missed dad, and how excited he was to see him. But that wore off - I think it took too long for dad to actually materialize, so now he's back to being bitter. We're trying different things to help. Last night, I marked off on the calendar all the days we've passed through so far this month, then circled the day dad gets here. Every day, we'll mark off another day. It seemed to cheer him up. He's seen the video of the new apartment. He seems to like that. "Look, our new bathroom! Look, that's our kitchen!" I've gone online to find him pictures of Calgary. I'm not sure what else to do.

An interesting tidbit - if you're ever in a Zellers, and there's an announcement of a "code yellow" over the PA, it means someone has lost their kid. Discovered that one the hard way. I took John to suit him up with new winter gear - we were trying to hold off until we got to Dryden, but we got a huge, huge snowstorm on Saturday (the day before our open house - figures). So we had no choice. He had a warm jacket, hat and mitts, and Mike's grandma sent him a new scarf that he likes. But he said his boots were too tight, and the school requires snow pants, because they like to take the kids outside, and he had none.

Shoe shopping with John is always a breeze - he loves picking out new shoes. I always try to make sure he's there to pick out his own, because he enjoys it so much. The kids' boot isle had boy's boots on one side, girls' on the other. There was a stock girl there at the moment, and John being John struck up a conversation with her right away.
"Look at all these boots, Girl! They are so beautiful!" he said, waving his arms frantically at all the fluffy pink and purple girl boots. While they chatted, I checked out the selection on the boys' side - only two pairs were going to fit him, which I didn't thinkwas going to be enough selection for him. So my plan was to divert him away long enough to get him to another store - the Sears on the other side of the mall. But before I could, he fell in love with a navy blue number over on the boys' side, with twinkly lights, kangaroos and bright yellow trim. Lucky for me, it happened to be one of the two that would fit. He tried them on, loved them, and refused to take them off again. "Oh Mommy! They're so comfy!" he said.

And of course, they were tied together, and of course he wanted to parade around the store on them, so he spent the next few minutes, while we looked for a register, taking little baby steps so the plastic ties wouldn't trip him. I wound up having to put John on the counter so they could scan the boots with his feet still in them. That happens every time I take him shoe shopping.

The next department was where the trouble started. He didn't like the look of those snow pant things one bit! He was having none of that! So while I was picking out one that would match his jacket, he took off! I tried to follow him, but my stroller is big and they pack those racks in so tight at Christmas, he actually got away.

I asked a nearby employee if she'd seen him. "No. Have you lost a child?" I admitted I had, and suddenly, this mission to get him back was mobilized. "Don't worry," she said, very seriously. "We have Code Yellow." It was surreal. With a flip of her hand, three other people came rushing over to jot down a description. An announcement of a code yellow rang out over the loudspeakers, and the little crowd of workers were dispatched around the store to hunt down my kid. The whole thing took maybe 10 seconds before he was discovered sulking in the candy isle. Then everything returned to normal, as though nothing had happened. It was really something to see!

Now it's winter, and the battle over winter gear has begun. I watch these poor moms trying to wrestle their kids into snow gear day after day, and I've decided I'm not going to go down that road. John's been good - he's even worn his snow pants every day this week without a fuss. But today, he snapped, and refused to put ANYTHING on. So I said, OK. So out he went, into the ice and snow, in socked feet and indoor clothes. I got a few horrified glares from the moms, but the dads who saw had a chuckle and cheered me on. It took about three seconds before he was asking for mittens. We weren't even off the school yard before he was putting his boots on. By the halfway mark, he was fully bundled, completely of his own choosing. No wrestling required, and no frostbitten digits. Probably not something I can do in Calgary - though maybe he'd just get dressed that much faster out there!

Anyway, John is here, and wants to play some games. Better go! I'll try to take some new pictures soon!

lots of news!

Ok. Where to start.

THE MOVE

Mike got official approval for time off at Christmas! He gave them three options - they chose option B, which has him off from December 18-28. He's flying here the night of the 17th, then we'll spend the 18 and 19 packing up, then he and John are heading to Dryden in the U-haul. Joan and I have a flight booked for the 20th into Winnipeg - grandparents on the receiving end have been e-mailed our itinerary. If we can finish loading the truck in one day, Mike will head out the 19th, then we'll both arrive in Dryden the same day. Joan and I will be there until the 27th, when we fly out of Winnipeg, but Mike has to leave on the 26th. I was originally supposed to take the train with Joan, but the prices for everything had changed since we looked last time - they actually dropped for the plane. We're not sure how that happened - maybe they switched up to a bigger plane. No idea. It means no stop in Geraldton, which is unfortunate. But it's less travel time overall, which will be nice. For Joan and I, anyway. I know there are some concerns about John in the U-haul, but we think it will be OK. It's split into two legs, and if it's really that bad, we'll get him a plane ticket with me for the second leg. But we think it would be good for him to spend some "quality" one-on-one time with dad and a big truck is a pretty cool place to do that. John has been fluctuating between sad and mad when it comes to dad being gone. It has hit him pretty hard. But we'll play it all by ear.

We had looked into moving with a mover. We got lots of online quotes, and one in-home quote. They were all too high to justify it. The lowest one was $1400, which would have made it cheaper, but it was an estimate of 2,000 pounds. The in-home guy, who actually saw everything, estimated it at 4,000 pounds, with a quote of $4500. And with everything that Vicki just went through, we decided moving ourselves was probably the better plan.


JOAN

Joan had her second physio appointment on Thursday. They were really impressed with her progress, especially considering she had a flu, so we couldn't spend much time on the exercises. They gave me a whole bunch of new stuff to focus on. Lots of tipping her over onto her right side, and forcing her to prop herself up. She doesn't like it - she cries. But they noted that she can actually get herself up from a semi-reclining position on her right, which tells them she has good strength. They said in that case, she isn't crying from pain or discomfort - she's crying out of fear. They compared it to asking someone to get on a bike and ride it for the first time - it's a new thing, with new movements, and it feels very scary at first. But as she gets used to it, she'll start initiating it on her own.

They also showed me how to stimulate her tummy muscles so that she'll pop up on all fours. They told me to keep her up on all fours for as long as she can hack it each day, because it builds tons of muscle, and the "pushing" action is critical for mobility down the road, like getting up off the floor. And if we do it enough, there's actually a chance she will crawl, which is the ideal scenario. They said there are a lot of people walking around that never crawled as babies. But for kids like Joan, it's worth the effort to teach her how, because it builds upper body strength and coordination, which she's lacking. There's still a chance she never will, though. She may just use the strength from these exercises to pull up and walk.

They talked about the braces she'll need. They showed me the hand brace, which is just a soft foam glove, designed to hold her thumb out, because now it's always tucked in. And the harder she works, the tigher she balls her fist, which works counter to the therapy. We may not have enough time ot get one - she didn't have one we could take, because they need to be custom made and fitted to her. But she's going to see what she can do.

The really big news was her foot. She doesn't hold her foot flat, so it's going to be hard for her to bear weight on it. So the physio guy said she's going to need a special orthotic brace. It's a custom-made plastic cast type of a thing, which will hold her leg and foot in perfect allignmnet, therefore forcing the muscles to grow and stretch in the proper way for walking.

The catch? They cost $1,000 each, and because they're form fitted, she needs to get a new one every time she grows. In Ontario, the government will pay 2/3 of the cost. At the time, we weren't sure what Alberta did, if anything, so he rushed around to get us some appointments, but the soonest she could be fitted was January 11. I took it, because at the time, we weren't sure if Mike was able to get the time off over Christmas. If he couldn't, we'd just stay for the fitting. But Mike did get the time off, so I'll have to cancel the whole thing, and have it made in Calgary. Fortunately, we did some looking, and they have a similar program there - the province will pay 75 per cent of the cost, and the cost to individuals is capped at $500/year/family. So it will never cost us more than $500/year, no matter how many of these little braces she goes through. I'll probably do some phoning around to make sure that's really the case. But it seemed pretty clear, so I don't think we have to worry too much. Physio guy said her physio will be covered there, too. They'll set her up through a similar clinic at the Calgary Children's Hospital, so Alberta Health and Wellness pays the tab, which is good to know. The government isn't run entirely by heartless blue robots after all. It sucks that we're moving to the only province in Canada where we even have to wonder if things are covered. But so far, it looks like everything will be OK.

THE HOUSE

Not sure if it's just my experience, or if the entire real estate industry is completely crazy. It's filled with spazy people. We had one showing that our agent didn't even tell us about. I went outside to go pick up John from school, to two men on the porch expecting to be let in. They had an appointment. I didn't know, so the beds weren't made, and the dishes weren't done. It was very embarrassing. We've had agents come so late, that I've left for the showing, then come back, and THEN they arrive. My favourite one was the agent who arrived half an hour early to let me know he couldn't make it, but his client was still coming, so could I please stick around. He even picked out things that I was to point out to his client. I did the whole showing. If he buys it, I expect part of the commission. Hopefully, it will sell very, very soon, because this really, really sucks. We're having an open house next weekend - maybe something will come from that.

Anyway, John wants to play, so I'd better get going!
A note from John:
ssffffhkkl;;'[ihgffdffhhuk;;;;;;;;;;ppouuuuuu;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;////////;;;;;;;/////////;;;;/////////

a three household household...

We've been apartment hunting in Calgary on and off for the last little while. It was a little early to really start, but Mike found a gem. So he toured it, applied for it, and won it, all in one day. Boy, things move fast out there!

We had originally planned to hunt together, but this place looks like a real find, so we kind of had to nab it. It means having a house and two apartments for a month, but that's life, I guess.

It's half of a little teeny bungalow duplex, but it comes with the full basement underneath it, so lots of storage, a spare bedroom, bringing it to a three bedroom, and a washer and dryer of our own - a big plus with kids. Lots of storage space down there, plus half a double garage. The extra bedroom n the basement can be used if anyone wants to visit - you can have your own room down there. On a daily basis, we might use it as an "escape" room - when the kids start to drive us nuts, we can leave them with the other, and go down there to read. Or just sit in glorious silence. It has a little yard, too. But we don't need that, because there are three parks within a block! One is a shady little kid's playground. The other is a leash-free dog park, but it has a playground inside it, and a big hill, that people use as a toboggan hill in the winter, and a walking type park around a community centre, which is the hub of the neighbourhood association (EVERY neighbourhood in Calgary has a centre and an active association - we're a block from ours.) It has tennis courts and little programs and stuff. It's also near a school. It has full day kindergarten, which might be good, when the time comes, if we're still there. It's $900/month. With utilities, it works out to $100 or so more than we wanted to spend on housing, but it sounds like a better quality of life. Everything else we were looking at were yucky basement apartments. This is soooo perfect for us, and it sounds like a great place for kids. Oh, and they actually have no problem with the kids, or the cats. Most places won't take either. That's right - they can afford to be so picky about tenants in Calgary that most refuse to take families.

The company that manages it posted a video - here's a copy, so you can all see. It's a bit buggy in this format - you might have to keep bumping it along manually, but you get the idea:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWIgm0ZqM7Y

Much, much more to update, but I've got to get dinner and bedtime moving. Joan had a physio appointment yesterday, and I'll try to post about it very soon.

more safari pics!

busy weekend

Just some of the pictures from the Steel City Safari on Sunday - definitely the highlight of a busy weekend. Even though John insisted he didn't want to go, I dragged him anyway, and boy, am I glad I did! The second we walked in, he was in his own little world, darting from display to display, then back here, then over there, and back around again. Notice him not looking into the camera in any of the shots - I may as well have not been there. I actually lost him in the crowds a couple times. Thankfully, he had a few favourite displays he kept returning to again and again, so I just checked them, and found him every time.

It was a big charity event, where all the local little zoos and conservation type groups - as well as the local reptile store - brought in animals to the convention centre for an afternoon. I expected John to want to stay maybe an hour or two. Almost four hours later, they were shooing us out. I think it was the Hamilton Conservation Authority who brought a hay infusion, and set up a "microscopic safari" with various little swamp crawlies under microscopes. John really liked that one. So much, that when he saw they had packed their equipment, he ran over, threw his body across the bins and pronounced "You can't take them away!" The guy running the station seemed to appreciate his enthusiasm, but he still had to take his crawlies home to the lake. He loved the turtles too. He spent more time there than anywhere else. He enjoyed petting the big snakes, too. He kept following the anaconda around. There was a display of scorpions, which he called lobsters. He looooved the goat petting zoo. I must have spent $8 on little handfulls of food for these goats, who'd probably never eaten so much in their lives. The picture above is John trying to feed a very overfed goat, which was falling asleep. He was also very big on the pony rides. I think he took 5 pony rides by the time it was all said and done. He kept slipping through the gate. He was so excited about the whole thing, I think he missed the part where I had to pay $4 every time. But, it made him so happy, and it all went to charity, so it was $20 well spent. There were birds too. He wasn't too big on the parrots, but he liked the ducks. I was surprised he wasn't excited to see an owl, because he loves owls, but he was a kind of blah about it. But he wouldn't have anything to do with anything furry. Probably because almost everything furry was something big and scary, like wolves and lions. No interest in those at all. But frogs and snakes and turtles and bugs? They were awesome! All in all, a really fun time. I'm glad was able to take him to that. Just wish dad was there!

On that note, the cat is out of the bag. I resigned form my job at the Review on Friday, so now it's public knowledge that we're on our way to Calgary. It was a sad thing. As much as being a working mom was tough, I'm going to miss my job a lot. My paper was in this kooky little town that reminds me so much of Dryden. It was like being home. I'm not going to miss the gruelling slog of day-to-day life with little kids and a full-time job, and the futile hunt for the perfect work-life balance. But I'll miss the people and the personalities and all the politics of small town life.

On the house front, it's still not sold. I think we're at the one month mark now, with our first open house either this Sunday or next Sunday. We're hoping it will sell before we move, which should be around Christmas, if all goes as planned.

As for Joan, she has John's stomach flu. Fever, vomiting, the whole thing. She seemed overly crabby, though. She wasn't eating or sleeping for couple days and I'd caught her picking at her ear, so I scooted her up to the Doc on Monday morning, while I still had a car, to have her checked out. She did have an ear infection, so it was a good call. She's on her first round of banada-flavoured antibiotics. I'm glad I took the flavoured kind, because even with all the sugar, she hates it. Even John says it smells yucky. But she seems to be getting better. She's sleeping better, at least, and she's not so pale.

While I was there, the doc mentioned the stroke. He said he was completely floored when he read the letter from the pediatrician. He said that never even crossed his mind. It's things like that that make me glad I live in a city - our doctors aren't any better than northern doctors - they just have more resources to draw from.

Anyway, better go! Mike should be home from work by now, so I should give him a call. They have him on this horrible noon-8 shift. It'll be fine when we're all there, but the two hour time difference means he's getting home very late for me. It's no fun.

Joan's physio

Sorry for the late update, everyone. I started writing this last night, but Joan woke up, and one thing led to another, and it got put off.

Yesterday was Joan's physio day. It was, in a word, awesome! What a cool little facility! It's an entire little building devoted to kids with problems like Joan's, filled with therapists who specialize in babies and kids. It was very, very cool.



We met her little team for a two hour assessment. (Man, was I glad John had a sitter for that!) She has a physio student, a physiotherapist, and an occupational therapist. They asked a lot of questions, took a lot of notes, talked to each other in physio-ese, which I didn't understand, and sent us on our way with a few more appointment dates, and a bunch of things to do with her in the meantime.



It was very neat watching them work. It looked to me like they were just goofing around and playing with her, but they were actually testing for very specific things. At one point, the physio guy was swinging her back and forth, singing her a song, and I thought he was just trying to cheer her up, because she was getting tired and crabby. But then he "sang" to his student to make note of a certain thing one of her legs was doing as he swung her. As they went, they pointed things out to me. Some of it was quite technical. I got a bit of a crash course in anatomy, and how muscles and ligaments work together - all well beyond the scope of my OAC biology - but they dumbed it down fairly well for me.



So, what did they say? In a nutshell, she's going to be OK. She's way, way more mobile than most kids they see with this condition. They said most never open their fists, and can't physically move their arms - they just keep them clamped up to their sides. So it's like we're starting with a huge head start, which is very good news. They said she has good range, and good function- they just need to get it to the next level. The goal isn't to make her right-handed, because that isn't realistic or necessary, but to make her right hand a useful supporting hand. And they said by watching her, that's entirely possible. Physio guy said he sees great things in her future, and thinks that with therapy, she'll be able to lead a completely normal life.



The stroke DID affect her right leg, but less dramatically than her arm. It displays "toning" I think they called it, which is caused by a stroke - when her good side is working hard, she tenses her bad side - she curls her toes and balls her fist. It's one of the things they have to work on. That's where the hand brace comes into play.



In terms of time, we're looking at years. They said it's about goals - both our goals for her and her own goals for herself, as she gets older. Right now, the goal is to get her using her right arm, and get her to bear weight on it, to build up the muscle. Then, the goal will be to get her mobile - she'll probably need extra help learning how to walk. Maybe climbing will be another goal. Later down the road, maybe it will be writing, or sports. She'll keep running into limitations as she grows, and her body is expected to accomplish more, so as those expectations crop up, she may need more therapy. They said it's slow, and often frustrating, especially at this age, when they don't understand the end goal. But they were all confident she'll get where she needs to be.



They said mentally, she's a "smart cookie." And they said she has a great attitude and temperament - she's happy and easy going, and they were impressed by her drive - that she tries so hard to accomplish, even though it's hard for her. They were very impressed that she's progressed from having a gimpy hand flopping behind her to being able to get up on all fours, all by herself.





This was just an assessment - her first actual appointment isn't for a couple more weeks, then we go every couple weeks as long as we can. That's when they get into the nitty gritty of specific games and exercises. But because we're all eager to get a jump start, they gave me a few things to concentrate on in the meantime. They suggested little games, like putting a sock on her left hand - it forces her to try to get it off with her right hand. He said sometimes, pediatric stroke patients adapt by using their mouths as their second hand, so to make sure she's not pulling it off with her teeth instead. Putting toys in hard-to-reach places is another fun game. She really, REALLY doesn't like that one, but it forces her to stretch her muscles out, and it will force her to bear weight on her right arm, or else she'll fall. She needs to do lots of stretching out, or else the muscles will shorten, and therapy will become even harder. And I'm supposed to position her in such a way that she's forced to support herself with her left hand, so that she has to reach for a toy with her right - that's another exercise. They also told me to keep her from turning her wrists a certain way that she does, because that also lets her muscles shorten. And it's important to turn off all of my mommy instincts to do these things, they said, because she's really not going to like it. They said she's found a happy place - she can sit up and play with stuff, and she does that very well. The stretching is going to be challenging for her, but I can't let her wimp out. She's going to get mad and frustrated. But she needs to get through this to progress to the next step, which is the all-important goal of mobility - she needs to be able to bear weight on her arm to get up off the floor. Sigh. But they also suggested I bring the Jolly Jumper back out, so she'll like that.

I asked if she'll have her good arm put in a sling, like people have been telling me will happen. They said it's actually a splint, and perhaps down the road a ways, but not anytime soon - she's too young and too early in the process for that. And the goal is to have her hands work together like a team, each with its own purpose, so it's a form of therapy they use sparingly, if it's even needed at all.

There were several interesting things she did there that I'd never noticed. She's a good spinner - she can pivot around both on her bum and on her belly. But they discovered she can only spin counter-clockwise. They put toys on her right side, to try to get her to pivot clockwise; she couldn't do it, so she actually spun all the way around to get to the toys. Also, she can't actually change positions, which is something I'd never even really thought about. If she's sitting, she can't get down on her belly - I have to put her there. She's almost able to sit up from belly, but not 100 per cent. Helping her get down on her belly is one of their goals with the stretching exercises - eventually she'll be able to stretch far enough that she'll flop right over.

I told them that she seems to have abandoned crawling altogether - even when she is on her belly, she doesn't even try anymore. Physio guy said that's totally normal. She wants to walk now, so she's concentrating on that. She'll definitely need help, though. If I prop her against furniture, she tries to cruise, but can't get her legs to do their thing yet. I think the Jolly Jumper is supposed to help with that.

That's about it, in a nutshell. It was very informative, and they were very positive and uplifting, and despite a few frustrating games, Joan had a great time playing. It was a very active two hours for her. She was pooped when we left - she fell asleep in her stroller even before we got to the edge of the parking lot!

Other than that, things are chugging along. John is back in school today. I wish he'd gotten more rest yesterday. He stayed home from school, but the sitter was with him for four hours in the afternoon, and she took him from his cozy blanket in front of the TV, and made him walk around the neighbourhood, and go for a drink at a restaurant, and then rake leaves, and play with the neighbours. By the time I got home, he was completely toast, even though I asked her to take it easy on him, because he's just getting over a bad flu. I felt bad dropping him off at school today. He looked pale, and still has a bad cough. But I'm not allowed to miss three days in a row without a doctor's note, because it's a taxpayer funded program, and he's not sick enough to warrant a trip to the doc. So off he went, hacking and spluttering away.

Speaking of John, it's time to head out to pick him up. I'll try to keep you all updated as things go. The next few days are going to be busy, with Jer moving out. I'm stopping by the paper on Friday for a visit, too. That should be an exciting field trip. There's a Steel City Safari event I want to take the kids to this weekend, as well. It looks like a lot of fun - lions and tigers and snakes and things. I think John would enjoy that a lot! I'll take the camera!

that time of year...

It might look like a little too much insulation, but she loved it. It was -1 this morning, so thought I'd better break out the heavy duty winter gear. She's been so fussy in the carriage the past couple days, but fell asleep today - guess she was just cold! Ooops! John's been in hats and mitts and winter coat for some time, because they play outside at school. But he'll need a new pair of boots - the ones from last year are at least two sizes too small.

The teacher pulled me aside again today. They're trying to find ways to motivate John to walk while on little voyages through the neighbourhood. Apparently, he tends to sit on the pavement and refuse to move - so they wind up carrying him, which is of course exactly what he's after. I gave them a couple of ideas of things that I do to keep him moving, and remembered a few more later - I'll have to pass them on tomorrow. Mostly, I suggested to keep dangling carrots in front of him, like "Hey, let's go check out that cool thing over there!" I do a lot of that. It's been easy with Halloween, because we've been hunting for decorations. But Halloween was a while back, now. It's hard to keep a kid motivated to move when there's nothing to see but decaying pumpkins. Some of my tactics wouldn't work - sometimes, we go "choose your own adventure" style, where John gets to choose the path home. He has a very good sense of direction. He always gets us home. We often play hide and seek on the way home. Probably not the greatest idea with nine three-year-olds. But he's made up a game which is essentially red light, green light, which all the kids might find fun, and he likes to pretend to be different animals out for a walk, which they might like, too. I also just leave him behind sometimes. It's a great motivator. But again, probably not the greatest plan with nine kids. And actually, not the greatest plan with John for much longer, either, I think. He's started calling my bluff. We have a sub shop on our way home, and sometimes he likes to stop in, and split a meatball sub and a chocolate milk. He calls it the meatball sandwich store. I let him order, and pay, and then we sit down and have lunch, while we talk about his morning at school. It has big windows, so we can watch diggers and buses and garbage trucks and ambulances and stuff go by, and it's a hopping place, so he gets to watch all of the people coming and going, too. It's cheap, so a lot of workers and cabbies stop there for lunch, so he talks about their cabs and tool belts and big trucks, and lots of them wear boots like dad's. He thinks it's a lot of fun. Well, one day, he wanted to go, but it was raining and cold, so I wanted to go home. So, I said no. Well, he pulled a tantrum, so I kept walking, thinking he would follow me, as usual, only to find him heading the opposite direction, towards the meatball sandwich store! He was totally prepared to go by himself. But it was across the busiest street in town, and I had visions of him getting schmucked. So, I'm ashamed to say, I gave in, and we had lunch at the meatball sandwich store.

Every now and then, he likes to go to convenience stores, too. But I think he goes less for the stuff, and more for the interaction. He's allowed to pick one little treat, like a sucker - if he wants two things, he has to choose between them - and I always get him to go through the sale himself. He puts it on the counter, and pays the money, and takes the change, and says than you, and carries the little bag. John really enjoys it, and the clerks get a kick out of it, too. He never asks for very much - it's always gum, or a chocolate bar or something small, so I don't mind giving in now and then. I think it's a valuable life experience type thing. If both Mike and I drop dead one day, he'll know how to buy chocolate bars all by himself.

His teacher said he's very intelligent and creative and also a very independent thinker, which are all excellent traits, she said. And she said he learns very well, because while the other kids are rushing to try something new, he's hanging back. But it's not that he's shy or nervous - he's actually listening to the instructions. Then he'll go ahead, and know exactly what to do, while the other kids flounder a bit, because he took that time to learn first. She said it's an amazing thing to see. I find that at home too. If we find a new game, I just have to play it once in front of him, and he's got it down. She said he reminds her a lot of her own son, who was very much his own little person. "He's a kid after my own heart," she said. She said the other kids are her little "yes men" and do everything they're told, which is nice and cute, but she loves kids like John who have minds of their own, and aren't afraid to use them. It was a nice conversation. I can tell by watching him with the rest of the class that he's different from his peers, but it was nice to be told that that difference is actually a good quality. It made me feel a lot better.

Here's a few John anecdotes from the last few days, for your amusement:

The tooth fairy is a predominant figure in preschool TV and books. But John doesn't quite understand the full meaning, beyond the knowlwdge that money and the taking of things is involved when you lose a tooth. Last night, he pulled some piece of food goo out of his mouth. He assumed that must be a tooth, and put it under his pillow, pronouncing that it would change into coin overnight, and then the tooth fairy would come and take the coin, and "put it with all her other shiny things; gold, coins, diamonds, everything! away in her tunnel." I didn't correct him. This could save me a lot of money down the road.

Joan is of course still in that stage where everything goes in her mouth, which is running parallel to a phone obsession. As a result, phones are winding up in her mouth. John saw her do this yesterday, and promptly took the phone away, pronouncing "That not food, Baby! That's a telephone!" I told him that when he was Joan's age, he used to eat telephones, too, to which he folded his arms, stuck his nose in the air and replied "No, Mom. I eat lunch."

A couple of days ago, there was a bit of construction going on along our path home. A couple of guys and a digger were taking down an old bus shelter. John was transfixed, and wanted to watch for a while, so we did. One of the guys took a real shine to John, and kept coming up to talk to him, explaining step-by-step what they were doing and why, which was a really nice thing for him to do, I thought. After a while, John turned to me and said "I want to be a construction worker when I grow up! I want to drive a digger and be really dirty."

"You do?" I asked.

"Why not?" said John, shrugging his shoulders.

The worker was close enough to hear John say it. He started to laugh, and said "Kid, you should try to be something better than this."

John has not been put off, however. It's been two days, and he STILL wants to be a construction worker when he grows up. (Why not?)

Anyway, better go. I think Joan just pooped.

Joan update

Sorry - this is going to be short.

Finally, finally got a call from the "children's developmental rehabilitation program" - doesn't that sound serious - that Joan is scheduled for an assessment, November 13. She and I will be meeting both the physiotherapist and the occupational therapist - yes, two therapists - assigned to her. They'll be spending about an hour putting her through a series of tests, to figure out how they need to progress. Very good news - I was worried they'd forgotten about us. Not sure what to do about John. My instinct is to get a sitter, so I can focus on Joan. The last thing I need is a bored, grumpy preschooler having a meltdown during something as important as Joan's physio.

She's doing great, by the way. She's working herself so hard, trying to pull up! She is coming close, but it's hard for her. But she's making so much progress all by herself. The other day, she wanted to grab a shiny piece of foil, but had a cracker in her hand. So, instead of dropping the cracker, she passed it to her right hand, then picked up the foil with her left. She did it again when she wanted the phone - she dropped the cracker, then passed the foil to her right hand, and picked up the phone with her left. Yesterday, she was playing with a noisy wrapper. She held it steady with her left hand, while she wiggled it around with her right to make a crinkle noise. She sure thought that was funny! And this morning, the most exciting thing of all - she grasped one of my fingers in her right hand! She even had a choice of what hand to use. It was really cute, actually - she held my hand steady with her left, them grasped a finger with her right.

John's doing well, too. His teacher was helping me get him dressed in the cloak room, and said. "I don't know how you handle this guy. He's as smart as a whip, but he's soooo stubborn!" She said he really keeps her thinking, because he's wise to all of her tricks to divert and distract him. But, she says, she loves teaching "challenging kids," because they force her to be creative. Yup, my kid is "challenging". Sigh. I just hope he has teachers in real school as great as her, or he may run into some trouble.

He had a cool Dad dream last night. They worked together to catch a ghost, by luring it into a net with cherries, then they scared it out of the house.

Anyway, better go.